𝑫𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒏 4

Page 66

Stevanna

After that night I went home and all I could hear was the comments people left. People dragged Janet and some bullied me. The bullies would say things like "mommy didn't want you." The internet was having a frenzy, my phone was blowing up after phone call, after phone call.

Multiple people began calling me simultaneously, I didn't even have the courage to begin to read my texts. So I turned off my phone, I couldn't rest at all, I stayed up reading articles, blogs and posts people made talking about my family on my laptop. I had to put all of my socials on private just to block out people.

Somehow I was able to catch some shut eye. That morning the sounds of the chirping birds were the first sound I heard. My eyes fluttered open to the bright window shades. I rolled over facing the bedroom door to grab my phone. I turned it on to eighty six missed calls, twenty one voicemails and forty eight texts.

Most of my text were from family, some friends, and a whole lot of Bryan. Just looking at the missed calls and texts gave me anxiety, I wanted to crawl up in my bed and hide from the world. In that moment I closed my eyes and laid on my back taking a big exhale.

The roaring sound of my ringtone startled me in my own bed. I jumped to the sound, opening my eyes and checked it. Seeing Janet's name appear on my screen was somewhat calming to my anxiety. So I answered right away putting the phone to my ear.

"Good morning Stevanna, how are you" she spoke in a gentle calming tone.

"Tired, I barely slept" I sighed.

"Why not?"

"I saw almost every post and read every comment last night. It was kind of haunting, it kept me up all night"

I could hear her suck her teeth over the phone. "Do you need me to come over there and give you some company?"

"Please, seeing you will really help"

"Okay, I'm on my way"

I don't know how Janet felt but after her announcement to the world but to myself, it felt like a fresh start for the both of us. For some reason I was ready to put everything behind us. Knowing she was coming over ignited a flame of excitement in me.

It was the same excitement I felt as a child when I knew Santa was coming the night before Christmas. Janet use to be my hero before I knew she was my mother. I watched the Velvet Rope live concert special on MTV everyday when I was younger.

At that time I was eleven years old, dancing in front of the tv to "You." Knowing she was my mom at sixteen, was such a confusing time. My feelings have come full circle now. I'm just happy to create new memories with her.

I dressed comfy in my sweats and a crop top, my hair was untamed in a messy bun. Once Janet arrived I let her in and we sat at my table. "Did you eat today" she asked me.

"No I—"

She stood up with a worried look tilting her head. "Come on, you need some food in your belly, that's why you're not feeling well. Let me make you something" she said making herself at home. I watched as she entered my kitchen. "What do you have to cook in here" she asked.

"I'm not hungry" I said.

"We are opposites, when I'm depressed I eat"