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JAE'LYNN LENA HINES | 29
DATE : DECEMBER 25th. "SAVIOR DAY"
"Hey sweetface." I laid my head on his grave after placing the flowers down.
"I miss you, Kyrie's three now. He's exceptional in school. He asks for you everyday and he wants to come see you." I sniffled wiping my tears.
"He keeps telling me he's dreaming about you tell him how he's your greatest creation. That's what you said to him that day too." I continued ranting.
"The Neurology business has taken off. This evening we are doing your annual celebration. I know you never really like parties or people but it helps us remember you in a better light,"
"I'm managing the finances like you taught me it's been hard but I feel your presence with me when I cry or get overwhelmed,"
"Your mom is gone too, I'm sure you know that though. I don't know if it was the stress of you taking your life or the fact that RJ did it too thinking he could be with you again." I said my thumb tracing over the small headstone beside his,"
"Her health just rapidly declined and it led to her demise,"
"I miss Lee everyday. Romano is three now and although Pablo is stressed and more cold and reserved we still help and offer him a shoulder to cry on,"
"I know you know most of this but venting to my husband happens to be the only thing I look forward to along with coming home to our son. Some days are easier than some. I wish you were here to experience his first step, his first full sentence and his little swag and attitude now,"
"Mi know mi did seh yuh fi guh dung but mi never mean literally." I finished laughing softly as I wiped more tears.
Hugging his headstone I leaned my head down praying intensely before kissing it and standing to my feet.
Walking out of the grave yard with my heart a bit lighter, I got in the car driving to Pablo's house to pick my son up. He loves his grandfather but its 6:00pm and certain times of the day he just won't tolerate anybody but me.
Reaching under ten minutes, I rung the doorbell seeing him open the door, bags under his eyes and the children hugging around his foot.
"Hi pops." I frowned hugging him.
"Hi princess, yuh guh talk to him today don't?" He said referring to my visit to Savior's grave.
"Yeah, I did. You know I always do." I said pulling apart.
"Mmommyyyy!!" I heard from the ground as I lifted him up seeing that Pablo did both his, Romano's and Kyrie's hair the same. In two cornrows.
"Really pops? Two cornrows?" I asked kissing my son.
He's the living replica of his father.
"It's almost 6:30, I'm leaving to get ready." I said kissing his forehead and hugging him once again waving to Romano as we left.
"Mommy grandpa says he misses mommy. Is she with daddy and uncle in heaven?" He says making mention to RJ and Lee.
"Yes baby, right now he's looking down us with grandma and uncle." I said kissing him as we went to the car.
"I know he told mwe in the dream last night.. also dada said he hates parties but he'll.." He said stopping.
"He'll what papa?" I asked as he scrunched his nose up.
"I try to remember." He frowned.
"Tolerate it?" I asked as he clapped while nodding as I placed him in his seat.
"Yeth!"
Thinking about it my eye watered. Every year I wear the dress he got me on our honeymoon.
I really miss him it's crazy how someone can just be here then they aren't.
"Mommy in the dream.. dada also says he lwoves you! And nono crying today." He says as I smiled.
"Okay papa, mommy won't cry. I'll get us home and we can eat then get ready to go."
8:30pm
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"Uncle leave mommy alone!" Kyrie says as Kyzier video's us.
"No uno affi go dung why you dress like me?" I heard Kyzier said being childish as he held True in the other hand.
"Uno think mi fi do this da year yah? Mi jus wah go home guh cry." I said as my son held my cheek pecking it.
"Remember dada said nono crying mommy." He scolded as we entered the room the music low and calm.
Putting him down so he could play, he waited on True and held her hand before running off to the other kids.
"Yuh son like off mi daughter." Kyzeir teased as he put his hands around my shoulder.
"We got you." He said as we approached everyone feeling myself being pulled in a hug.
"It jus ago get harder everyday but we got you. Lee and him a watch yuh from heaven right now. Little RJ too. You were the sister he never had." Shantae added as they pulled me in a group hug.
