group chat ➳ l.h. [completed]

t w e n t y - f o u r

Everything seemed to happen faster than I could ever imagine.

My grandmother drove in silence as I looked out of the car window feeling physically and emotionally drained.

I told the police the truth, because what was the point of lying? Grandma would rat me out and the rude officer would check all my files to find out my real birthday.

There was simply no way out of this.

And it was because of Joseph. Or hell, maybe it was because of me.

I went to him thinking it was best because he was my age, and maybe it would be best, but I was and am in love with Luke. Nothing could change that except lots of time, and time was what I was being given.

However the thought of forgetting him or stopping my feelings for him ached inside of my chest like a sudden heart burn. Like everything was on fire and it was only cooled by my tears.

The birds weren't singing anymore like they were when I was on my way to see Luke. And the trees weren't as pretty either. Not to me, at least.

I simply did not care about anything, because Luke was gone and there was no way he was getting out anytime soon.

I refused to speak during the whole car ride, and it only took me a few seconds to realize where my grandmother was driving me as I began to recognize the familiar neighborhood.

"Why are we-" I whispered, my voice hoarse from crying so hard at the prison.

"You're eighteen and I believe your mother is still sending you money monthly for the bill. Get out." She said, and I could tell that she was fighting back more tears by her shaky voice.

"Grandma, please-"

"Get out. I don't need a child of sin in my home. I don't need another daughter like your mother." She snapped, now full on sobbing.

I sat for a few moments, wondering when the hurt and pain was going to stop.

"Get out!" She yelled once more, and I watched as countless tears fell down her wrinkled cheeks as I quickly got out of the car with disbelief printed all over my face.

And just then as I closed her car door, she was gone and neglected to look back. Just like the man I love had done.

Was it a crime to love too much?

Was it a crime to be so happy? Because it seemed whenever I was finally growing okay with the thought of life and love it was suddenly taken away along with my once existing happiness that was now a ghost somewhere in my body.

It yearned to be searched for, however I didn't have the energy to look.

That's what depression does, it takes away ones power to search for their happiness and throws away any extra energy that make sure it stays locked up.

Mine was now locked up along with Luke in his prison cell, and I knew then that he was right. I loved too much.

I put all of my love into him and none into myself, and now that he's gone, my pride went along with him.

I was shaky whilst entering my home. The silver key was under the mat like it always was, and it took me a few minutes, well thirty, before I could even enter the house that smelled of Luke's cologne.

The scent had fresh tears falling down over my dry ones from earlier, and I then realized that there were memories everywhere. Way too many fucking memories that had me crouched on the floor and sobbing as loud as I could as if the world could some how hear me and help me up. But it didn't, nothing could at this point.

His voice was everywhere.

"Winnie! Turn your music down."

"Winnie, dinners ready!"

"Winnie, sleep with me tonight?"

"I love you, Winnie."

My legs shook as I stood on my knees and finally upon my feet, and the voices were coming from nobody except my mind. My stupid, fucked up mind that wanted to go back to Luke even thought he ordered me not too.

I walked slowly past the living room, trying my best not to look at the couch that he kissed me on just days earlier before stepping into the kitchen.

I bit my lip and covered my mouth with my hand as I saw Luke's cake that he made me. Now crispy and still unfrosted.

Memories played in my head as I remembered when he pulled it out of the oven with a smile, because it was perfect.

The way he put my mothers apron on just because he knew it'd make me laugh. The way he would dance with the broom stick as he cleaned the floor, and the way he would just be himself. A sight I only really saw when my mother wasn't around.

I put picture frames of Luke and me down each time I saw one, not wanting the sight to eat me alive like my memories were at this moment.

It pained me to do so, but I had too.

However the worst part was his bedroom. Well, ours, as he would call it.

The covers and sheets were still messed up from the night he took my virginity, and the mini trash can that I was guessing the cops rummaged through was knocked over.

I picked it up and walked to his closet afterwards, knowing it would make me cry more, but did so anyways.

I looked through his shirts first, searching for my favorite one that I always loved seeing on him. It was a plain black one, not so special to most people. But this one the one he wore the most and I wanted to feel as with him as I could possible.

With shaky hands, I lifted my shirt up and tossed it on the floor along with my shorts. I then took in a sharp breath as I looked down at my stomach and legs, for it was clear that Luke's hands, lips and even teeth have traveled there, marking me. I loved the sight, and slid my fingertips over the marks before pulling Luke's shirt over my head and getting into his- our bed.

I tried to sleep, but was afraid.

The nightmares would surely come back, and I knew they would be worse than ever with Luke gone.

I gasped then as I heard the doorbell sound throughout my empty house, and I froze in place. Maybe my grandmother regret what she did? I thought and got out of the bed quickly before speed walking towards the front door.

I couldn't be alone at a time like this, I just couldn't.

"Grandma, I-"

I froze and looked at the person I opened the door too, and my lips parted in shock at the familiar face.

He had a saddened look on his face, something that was rare to see from him, so when I saw it I was weirdly afraid.

He pushed his big glasses up higher on his nose and attempted a smile.

"Calum?" I said in disbelief, feeling like the wind was being knocked out of me as he hugged me tightly.

"I'm here." He replied, and for a slight second, I could breath again.

_____

(A/N)

Surprise update ;)

Btw I was snap chatting a video to someone and I farted at the end of it and it was so loud like that was my best accomplishment that I caught on video SO YEAH THAT WAS MY DAY WBU.

-Bailey xoxo