Chapter 4

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Tyler's POV
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I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but I did. It's been a while since I cried properly. 3 days maybe. Breathing during the night was painful and the only position I could sleep in made me lay in an uncomfortable position.

I had no idea I was crying until I heard Troye softly calling my name.
"Tyler?" I held my breath and bit down on my bottom lip in the attempts to stay silent.

The night went by painfully slow, every second dragged on into infinity and my side ached like I just got hit by a truck.

I couldn't lay any longer. I proper myself up and quietly sneaked out of the room. It was about 5am. Clutching my side I walked down the stairs making sure I didn't see my father downstairs. Luckily he was gone, he usually was when I was at home, he said he didn't want to be under the same roof as 'my kind' when it was possible.

I put on a black pair of trainers and a black jacket. Without hesitation I turned the doorknob and made my way out of the house.

The fresh air cleansed me as I breathed it in, the pain was nearly gone and I was able to relax.

My walk must have taken about ten minutes. I walked up and down the street 3 times until I was too tired to walk any longer.

As I walked into the house I could feel the result of my sleepless night.  I quickly took off my shies and jacket and made my way up the stairs. To my suprise Sage was already awake.

"Where have you been young mister?" She joked turning go face me.
"Damn Ty! Note to be rude or anything but you look like shit."

"Thanks for the compliment. Want anything to eat?" I started at her with a blank expression, I didn't have enough energy to smile at this moment in time.

"Um yeah. Pancakes please. I'll wake Troye boy up and we'll make our way down stairs."

"Okay then." Turning on my heel I stepped out of the room and made my way to the kitchen.

Troye must be a heavy sleeper since they weren't down for about 15 minutes. I already had some pancakes not bothering to wait for them.

Out the corner of my eye I could see Troye and Sage enter the room.

"Morning Ty."

"Morning."

Troye sat down in the wooden chair and looked infront of him. I left him a jar of Nutella since he loves it so much, that's what I remembered at least.

"You know me so well."
 
"Just don't eat it all, I can't be bothered to go to the shops just to get more Nutella." My voice was gravely and tired. I didn't want but to sound harsh but the lack of sleep stopped me from being my usual sassy self.

"You alright Ty?" Sage's voice was full of concern. Why would she be asking? She already saw me before. Whatever. At least it shows she cares.

I realised I didn't answer her for a bit so I hurried out my answer.
"Yeah, I just didn't sleep well that's all."

"Holy shit Tyler you look terrible. Go back to your room and go to sleep rest." Without a question I turned off the cooker and made my way to my room.

When I heard the front doors close downstairs i let out a scream I didn't know I was holding in. As soon as it was in I felt at ease. I collapsed on the bed and layed there until my eyes finally closed and I drifted away.

*Dream*

I was running across the warm golden sand. Not a care in the world. This is the life that I always dreamed of, being free and happy. The sky was a messy painting odd blues, yellows and pinks, so messy that it was almost perfect.

The small waves touched the golden sand touching my exposed foot. A wave of pleasure traveled through my body.

All of a sudden my body became paralyzed. A pair of hands gripped my shoulder earning a painful whimper to escape my parted lips.

Warm air brushed over my ear as the person leaned closer from behind me.
"You'll never get here." As the words left his lips the sky's became black, not a single star was present. Strong and savage waves crashed against the shore and the sand was no longer warm, it was cold and full of small and painful stones.
"Never...."

*End of dream*

I woke up and sat up frantically. A layer of sweat covering my body.

"Just a dream." I kept repeating these words to my self quite frequently in the last five or so months. Ever since I found out that I'm wasting my life staying here the dreams started to become more regular.

My youth is being wasted. I have so much I want to do but I can't seem to be able to leave. It's as if I'm in chains, I can move just enough to to basic tasks but I can't get away.

My phone started ringing and I found Sage's contact light up the screen. I picked up the phone eagerly, Sage always made me feel so much better and she had no clue how much help she is.

"Hey Sagey boo." A little chuckle reached my ears.

"Nice nickname Tyler boo." I found that it wasn't Sage pm the phone. In fact it was Troye.

"Fuck off Sivan!" I tried to hold in my laugh but as soon as I heard him laugh I gave in.
"Why you calling me fucktard?"

"Firstly, rude. Secondly, I was wondering if you and I could go somewhere since my family is going out and I don't wanna be alone."

"Why are they going?"

"Well, you see, my family didn't know I was coming except my dad. However I only told him a month or so before I came and they already had plans. So you wanna hang out?"

"Sure? What do you wanna do?"

"Umm... I... I don't know?" He sounded so innocent and scared, almost as if he was a five year in a twenty year olds body.

"Whatever we do I bet it's gonna be fun. Just like the old days."

"Really?"

"My youth is yours. I trust you."

"Well I'm looking forward to see you tomorrow at around five. I'll pick you up on my noble stead." I could feel his smile through his cheery words.

"I'm looking forward too Sivan."

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AN
Exactly 1100 words! I know it's short but whatever. This chapter took me a week and I'm so sorry for that. I tried doing an update every other day but I realised that it would be too hard. That's why I might do one or two updates a week.

Also YOUTH CAME OUT AND I UGGGGH I CAN'T SPEAK AND MY BODY WASN'T READY FOR SUCH AMAZINGNESS! !!!!!!!

On a more serious note I would want to say that my heart is with everyone who has recently been affected by the attacks.

Bai my lovelies.

Twitter @ IsTroylerTrash

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