Eleven

sixty one.

"will you be there." he asked.

"when?"

"new years day, for my surgery." he looked hopeful.

i hesitated.

i couldn't possibly be there when i was having surgery too.

he took my hands and whispered "please tell me you'll be there."

i couldn't answer because my phone rang, revealing itself to be nancy.

"hello nancy." i gestured to dallas that this would only be a minute.

"indigo, i'm afraid this isn't good news."

my heart sank.

"what are you talking about?"

"it's lily."

"lily? shes fine. her doctor just discharged her a couple days ago."

"no indigo. her parents discharged her. the cancer spread all over her body. they wanted her to spend her last few days at home. happy."

my heart was beating loud against my chest.

"what are you trying to tell? she's fine right."

tears pricked my eyes, not believing.

it was silent over the line.

"right?"

"indigo, i'm afraid that lily passed away this afternoon."

"no. your lying. why would you be this cruel? tell me the truth."

i was in denial, tears were flooding my eyes, making it hard for me to see.

"it is-"

"no!" i shouted over the line.

i smashed my phone on to a rock, it smashing into pieces.

"please god, not again. not again." i sobbed falling to the ground.

"blue, what's wrong?" dallas said, but i couldn't pay attention to him because all i could think about was how it happened again.

"first my mother dies of leukemia, now lily." i felt him hold me in his arms, soothing my sorrows.

lily.

she's..

she's..

dead.