Never ; steven f

twenty-seven

     -not edited

 I stood there not daring to breathe. Her fucking phone layed on my bed face down. I grabbed her phone and UN locked it. The message that was sent to me wasn't there. So much things ran through my head. How? Why? I had no idea how this happened. Maybe I was dreaming? I don't think I was dreaming. I remember it clearly. I got the message ten minutes ago. I walked over to my bathroom and sat in there in silence. My phone was in my pocket. I grabbed it and tapped on my messages. The message wasn't there anymore. The fact that I got a fucking message from her scared me. This isn't fucking possible, she's in a coma. Its not like her spirit came and messaged me. That would be insane. 

         I got up from the bathroom floor and grabbed my jacket from my bed. I walked over to the kitchen and got five dollars from my families saving jar. I was about to leave when I saw a Polaroid picture on the ground of Andrea and I. I grabbed the picture and looked at it for a few minutes. Oh how I miss her. I miss how when she smiled her eye color would pop. I miss how when she was sad she would text me all day. I miss how when she laughed I would get butterflies. I miss everything about her. She was the best person ever. Now every time I see her at the hospital I think, I could have saved her. I could have jumped in and saved her. I'm a fool. I looked at the picture again and admired her appearance. I remember this day clearly. We went To an ice cream shop called scoops, in Los Angeles. She wore her favorite Shirt that day. A white shirt that had H A L S E Y in all caps. I still remember what ice-cream flavor she got, Andrea got Vanilla ice-cream with chocolate sprinkles. That's her favorite flavor. Theres just so much emptiness without her. It's been a few months now and I still can't get used to not talking to her every day. Today was cloudy; just like my mood and feelings. Not much has been going on. Everything is the same, just a bit worn out, Even my neighbor Mrs.V looks worn out. The trees are a bit brown, there is no kids at the playground anymore, the swings seem sad as well, only the wind pushes the swings. Everything is sad. Without Andrea, everything and everyone seems sad.

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Guess who fucking updated? me. YOU GUYS IM SCREAMING. i HaVe 13k ViEwS oMg bYe Im gOnNa Go EaT cHiCkEn