The Resident // Harry Styles H.S.

34

JANEL'S POV:

I woke the next morning, tired, feeling like sh.it, totally drained of any possible energy, and although my body felt hungry, my mind felt nauseous at the thought of food.

I didn't want to faint again, even though no one would know this time, and I'd wake up and go about my misery alone. So I looked for food.

Everything in the fridge reminded me of Harry. We had always shopped together, and it was always a good time. He'd try to embarrass me in the store, and I'd try to expose him to the public and get people to realize who he was behind that hood and glasses. And sometimes a beanie. So he'd possibly get mobbed. I'd show him!

I shook my head to stop the memories, and focused on my search for some sort of food that my mind didn't make my stomach wretch at the thought of.

There was none.

Despite there being plenty of food in the fridge and cabinets, I couldn't get myself to eat any of it.

This was really bad. I sunk down the against the kitchen wall, in sheer desperation.

I sat against the wall on the floor for probably an hour. I watched the sun move across the window slowly. I watched the shadows on the wall change as it moved. I just sat there, lifeless. Hopeless. Wondering again, for the first time in about 18 months, WHAT was my purpose here on Earth? WHY was I here? And I thought of the bridge that I had planned to jump off of "someday" when I couldn't take it anymore.

And right now....I could NOT. TAKE. IT.

But my brain, ever trying to keep itself alive, said "what if you found out today that Harry didn't cheat on you?" and I decided the bridge would always be there, and I'd wait on that plan. Just like I had waited before I met Harry.

And to think I was soooo glad I had waited, once I met Harry.

Now, I was wishing I had jumped off, Lonnnnnnng ago, never having met him.

I would never have known all that I'd missed. And most importantly, I wouldn't be in the worst pain of my entire miserable life, right now.

I thought of Harry. I thought of how sad he looked. I wondered what he was doing right at this very moment. But then all I could picture was him waking up next to some woman. And having se.x with her before even stepping out of bed. Like we always did. There was always se.x. Wake up se.x. After breakfast se.x. After any meal se.x. Night time se.x. Bedtime se.x. Midnight snack se.x. I just stepped out to get the mail, oh thank God you're back, I missed you so much in that 3 minutes, se.x......

The mail.

I willed myself to get up. I didn't know WHY I wanted to see the new pics that I'd noticed on the floor yesterday when I got home, with all the other mail from yesterday. I guessed Harry had gotten the mail at some point. I picked it all up, and dropped the boring mail on the table. Next to the OTHER set of heartbreaking pictures.

I noticed Harry hadn't opened this envelope yet. Why wouldn't he want to see what he was busted doing THIS time? I'd wanna see what I was caught doing, if I had done something to be caught at.

Weird.

I tore it open. I was so weak, I could barely tear through the end.

I slid the pics out.

Staring me in the face when I finally got the will power to look down, was Harry and this mystery chick.

The chick was naked, and posing for Harry. His shirt was off, and his arms were reaching out for her.