Chapter 13- attack

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Josh's POV
"C'mon Josh buddy get out of bed." Tyler pleads. Tyler and Jenna spent the night in my hotel room with me the past few nights. The day after tomorrow we have a concert, and honestly I don't know if I'll be able to play. "At least get up, we have a concert to be too in a few days" Tyler says, I swear he's a mind reader. I'm not getting up, not till I know Lily's ok. Tyler has been constantly calling the hospital for updates but he hasn't been getting anything. "You can't go out their with your arm." I say trying to convince him to call off this concert. "I just sing, I hold a microphone, also I already talked to some people and my piano and instruments will be in the audio. They just need your drums and my voice. Also we can't let the clique down, Josh they love you." Tyler says, he's got a point. I love my fans, everyone of them and I can't let them down. But, I'm a person too. Wait, since when do I care for myself. I sit up and I feel nauseous. I stand up and run to the bathroom. I kneel down and throw the toilet seat open, I throw up and I feel someone running my back. I stop throwing up a horrible water substance, and sit back on the wall. I lean my head back and shut my eyes, defeated. I hear someone sit on the shower wall, "Your hungry you need to eat something." Tyler. It's Tyler. That's his voice, he's seen me worse but I wish he wouldn't see me now. I open my eyes and look at him, he's thrown his head in his hand and I'm pretty sure he's crying. "Tyler please stop."

Tyler's POV

"Tyler please stop." Josh says and his voice cracks, his voice only does that when he feels like crying. "Stop what?" I say looking at him. For the first time in a few days I see his body, I haven't been able to see it because he's refused to leave his bed. He has scratches all over himself, some fresh, some scabbed. His hair is all messed up and he's sweating, sweating bad, he has beads of sweat under his eyes and his eyes have dark circles around them. His eyes look dead and for the first time I'm scared of him, and scared for him. "Stop... Caring. Stop crying it's not worth it. It's only me. Stop!" He says and he breaks down. I hate seeing him like that. He curls up in a ball and starts crying. I try to be strong but there's only so many times I can do that before I can't. I break down too. "Josh, listen, I know you love her and she's not dead yet, there's hope-" "I know she's alive Tyler but it's all my fault!" He thinks it's his fault? No... It's not. "It's nobody's fault! Did you grab her and throw her off that cliff?! No! Josh she loves you! You need to get your sh*t together because Lily needs you! Jenna needs you! The clique needs you! I need you!" I yell and run out of the room and fall right on his bed. I bawl until my eyes hurt. I flip over on the bed so I'm looking up. I start hyperventilating and I throw my hand in my hair. Jenna comes over and holds me, holds me tight. I try my best to slow my breathing and calm myself down because I know if I get myself into another panic attack that will scare Jenna, and I don't want to do that. We need Lily, God please get better! "Jenna, I j-just don't know what to do." I say looking at the ceiling, I've got my breathing back to normal and I'm trying my best to not think about the world for a minute. "I don't either." Jenna says, she's obviously been crying and she probably heard everything that happened in the bathroom. I'm pretty sure she's as stressed out about this whole situation as I am. My phone starts ringing but I don't want to get up and get it, I don't wanna leave Jenna either. I let it ring till it goes to voicemail and I leave it at that. I shut my eyes, exhausted from everything. The phone starts ringing again, "D*mmit," I say getting up and walk to my phone. "Hello?" My voice sounds weaker than I thought it would, "Hi, this is Maddy from Davenport Hospital calling in regards to Lillian." I stand a little straighter and Jenna becomes alarmed, I put my hand out to her to tell her to be quiet, "Yes! What's up?" I say with mixed emotions. "She is able to leave the hospital and needs to be picked up, w-" "Yes be over there in 20!" I say cutting her off and hanging up, I know that's rude but right now I don't really care. I throw my phone on the bed and wave for Jenna to come here. I jump a little and run to the bathroom, "Josh! She's okay! Let's go pick her up" I say and I pull him up. He's hesitant, "let's go! fix yourself up!" I say but he still refuses to move, "no she's gonna hate me." He states. I reassure him she won't and he gets dressed right away. Let's go get lily back!

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