Chapter 33

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Niall pov

After a few moments a nurse found me and forced me back into bed. She replaced the iv lines and left me.




Tears continued to stream down my face.




I feel so empty already and she is probably still in this building.




I can't loose her.




I can't loose Analisa.




I can't loose the baby.




I feel so low, dirty, disappointed with myself.




I still can't comprehend the fact, the important fact, that I had a girlfriend.




How do you just forget something like that?




I'll tell you how; you find someone you've been searching for for five years at your doorstep with a child. Then it seems like the world stops spinning and everything is just focused on those moments.




My thoughts were interrupted by the door slamming open and shaking the walls. An infuriated Louis and Harry stormed into the room before slamming the door shut.




"How could you?" His tone of voice was calm, too calm. "How could you go and cheat on her after everything? How?!"




"I forgot about Mariah when I found her."




Louis shook his head as I tried to remain calm. "You can't just forget that you have a girlfriend, Niall."




"I did! You try to loose Olivia for five years and search endlessly for her before she shows up at your doorstep with a child you find out is yours! Then tell me that the world didn't stop and that you never forget anything except that moment."




He sighed heavily and Harry stepped forward placing a hand on my shoulder.




"Well because of your 'mistake' she's leaving."




My eyes widened and a tear slipped. "No."




"It's better for her and the baby to avoid stress right now. Which means you and the rest of us because of you."




I shook my head vigorously. "No! She can't leave! Not now! Not ever! I have to explain this to her!"




I began to throw the covers off me before Harry pushed me down on the bed.




"Mate, think about the baby."




I shook my head.




"It might be mine." I whispered out before trying to stand again.




Both Louis and Harry forced me back onto the bed.




"What?" Louis bellowed.




"The baby. It might be mine."




I saw fury rise in his eyes as his grip on my shoulder increased causing me to wince.




"You sure do know how to screw things up don't you."





"I try not to." I looked down ashamed at myself.




"Well you do. If you love her so much than stop hurting her!"




"I try so hard."




"Not hard enough." He looked at me with rage and disappointment. "Give her time. She may come around. If she will she'll do it when she's ready."




I sighed and closed my eyes to help block of the water works.




"She has to know the truth."




"Let her come to you."




I shook my head before opening my eyes. "I don't know if I can wait that long."




Louis plopped down in the seat that she once occupied for my duration here when I was unconscious. My heart broke further than ever before and shattered all along the bed sheets.




"You're gonna have to."




I sighed heavily. "Has she left yet?"




He shook his head. "No. She's asleep at the moment."




I looked down and began to fiddle with my thumbs. "Please, Louis. I have to talk to her before she leaves."




He shook his head. "I'm staying right here."




I looked at Harry pleadingly but he looked down at the ground and found his shoes interesting.




I silently prayed she would come see me before she left.




Why would she after all I've done to her?




I'm a monster.




~*~
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