Blind Child

77.

Beyoncé' Pov
Finding out you're husband of two months... has already cheated on you, been cheating on you, is hard........I can't help to wonder were we ever happy. Or did we try to play family..

August told me he was having an affair. Confirmation is what that was, because I already knew. I saw the signs.... I saw everything.. After I found out I didn't have time to sit and dwell. I got a movie offer right in the middle of my tour, I took it. We work around my schedule. Since I'm so busy August has Blue which I am kind of happy about, because my mind is not in the right place.

Trying to hide the hurt from your face on a daily is difficult. You have to smile for everyone even the media and you have to pretend... no one knows about the cheating except August and I.... As of right now I plan on keeping it that way.

After filming my parts I went to rehearsal, we're in LA. I haven't spoken to August nor Blue for two weeks... I know it isn't Blue's fault for anything. She's did nothing wrong... but when I finally open up my heart to people I get hurt..... I'm hurting on the inside and I feel myself slipping back into the old Bey....

I walked off stage and to the back. I locked myself in the dressing room and laid on my couch crying. I picked up the phone and called for my car to come. When it arrived I got in and made my way to my old studio. I hopped out and walked in before the paps could spot me.

I sat up my own session with a pen and paper, and began recording what I was feeling.

Me-.................You can taste the dishonesty, it's all over your breath. As you past it off so cavalier. But even that's a test.. constantly aware of it all.. my lonely ear, pressed against the walls of your world..

Hmmm, what to say next.

I sighed before taking off my headphones.. all I could do was cry.