deranged [sequel to unlovable]

part 3

[vanessa's pov]
day two is all about training. i've learned so much already. when damien isn't in work mode, he's actually really sweet & funny.
he's insane attractive, too... he has treated me nicely but he also pushes me to do better & i appreciate him.
"again." he orders.
i pull down the trigger and brace myself for the recoil. i have a stronger hold on it this time, i hit the target right in the middle.
"damn, girl. good aim." he smiles.
he puts his hands around my waist and grips me pretty tightly.
i turn my head and look into his eyes. there's a faint spark of passion and lust.. but then it fades.
my heart rate is fast again..
he keeps his hands on my waist, "one more time."
i raise my gun & shoot again. another bullseye.
"again." he whispers close to my ear, covering my body with goosebumps.
i shoot the bullseye again & then i turn around.
he slides his hands on my waist as i spin around. our bodies are pressed together.
my breathing increases.
what are you doing vanessa?
i pull his hands off my waist and drop my gun down on the table beside me before leaving the range.
what the hell was that?

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[caleb's pov]
"do you think she's coming back soon?" cody asks.
i bite my lip and look at the floor, "i don't know.. she got a lot of money from graduation, cody. her hotel passes will run out, though.. she could get a less expensive hotel.. i don't know. i really don't. this isn't like her."
i want her to come back. i miss her a lot...
it's kind of awkward with cody here.. but i'm managing to deal with it.
i probably should go home, though.. she's not coming back anytime soon. she made that pretty clear to me.
"i'll see you soon, cody. text me if you hear from her or get any updates, please." i say, grabbing my keys from the table.
he looks up from his phone and gives me a smile, "yes, of course. thank you for everything, caleb."
i nod and leave vanessa's apartment.

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[vanessa's pov]
i text both cody & caleb that i'm safe & they don't need to worry about me.
i'm going home tomorrow & i'm not even prepared.
what do i tell caleb? what do i tell cody?
maybe i should just pretend nothing happened. that i took time for myself & i'm fine now.
my brain hasn't been treating me very well..it's difficult. the voices are so loud.
"caleb hates you."
"you're done for, vanessa."
"no one loves you anymore."
"you're a fuck-up."
"you should just die.. why are you still breathing?"
"you're a disappointment."
"just disappear forever, vanessa."
i almost want to scream, so i bury my head in my pillow and wait for sleep to help me escape the voices for a while.

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i zip up my bags and take one final look around the room. i'll probably never stay in a room this nice again.. or anytime soon, at least.
my bosses are paying me a good amount of money starting next week.. i'll be making great money.
my life is in danger while doing this.. it's the least that they can do.
i pick up my bags & go out to the lobby. the valet employees ask me what car is mine & pull it up for me. they take my bags from me & put them in the trunk. i thank them & get in the drivers seat.
this is happening. i'm now going home to my family, friends and.. boyfriend(s)?
as i'm driving onto the freeway, i stare at my ring. he made a promise to me.. and i accepted.. but i didn't promise anything in return.
i have a long drive home. i like canada a lot more than the united states.
do i miss cody? yes. but he's still not the one i want with every part of me, he isn't my number one.
caleb is.

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[caleb's pov]
it's midnight now & i'm so worried about vanessa. i miss her so much. janice & i aren't exactly on great terms right now.. she's distanced herself off & spent more time with friends.
i'm watching vampire diaries.. vanessa recommended it a while ago and it's really good.
my doorbell rings and i practically sprint to the door.
please oh please oh please let it be her.
apparently, my wish was granted. she stands on my porch, mascara streaks on her cheeks. she's crying.
i pull her inside and engulf her in a hug.
i take a deep breathe & calm myself down.
she's here. she's here.

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[vanessa's pov]
i fucking hate crying. i hate it so much but i don't hate caleb. i love spending time with him, being in his arms...
he pulls me in for a hug and holds me tightly.
i breathe in his familiar scent. my headache suddenly disappears & i feel myself relax.
you're okay, vanessa.
"i missed you so much." he whispers.
"i missed you more." i croak out, trying to avoid crying even more.
he pulls away from our hug and looks into my eyes. i missed him so much. i missed us. i slide my converse off at the door and he takes my hand in his. he leads me to the couch and sits down first, followed by pulling me on him. i lean into his chest and hold onto him tightly.
"are you okay?" he asks.
i don't know.. am i okay? i feel okay right now.. but no. everything is crazy and fucking hard right now.
"i don't know." i whisper.
my eyes glance up to the tv to see netflix. vampire diaries.. oh my gosh.
i look up at him, "i'm proud of you."
"i'm proud of you, too." he smiles and leans down, connecting his lips with mine.
he tastes like sugar, like everything sweet. i'm addicted & i just can't get enough of him.
we switch positions so he's on top of me. he slides one hand under my waist. we intensify our kiss.
we need each other right now. did he miss me? he's sure proving it.
he pulls my sweatshirt off and then i hear him gasp, but not for the typical reason.
it's in shock, in fear.. in worry.
"vanessa.. please tell me that's fake. what the fuck is this?" he points to the bandaging.
tears prick my eyes, "please, caleb. i'm not ready to do this right now.. i'm fine now."
"you're going to tell me what this is.. right now, vanessa. i worried about you for so long. you owe this to me.. now why don't you start from the beginning." he sits back down next to me and waits for my response.

oh fucking hell.

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SPICY!

thank you for reading!!! xo

- adrianna