deranged [sequel to unlovable]

part 30

songs :
undo - the 1975
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[vanessa's pov]
i wake up & look around, remembering that i fell asleep in his arms.
i get out of his bed & walk to the bathroom to brush my teeth. sure enough, my toothbrush is still in the drawer.
i look up at myself in the mirror, my hair is messy & my cheeks are flushed.
i slept really well for once & that doesn't happen too often.
after i'm done in the bathroom, i walk around the corner to see caleb laying in bed on his phone.
"hey." i say upon entering.
he smiles, "hey."
i wrap my arms around him & lean into his chest.
he scrolls through instagram and looks at countless football videos.
"what do you wanna do today?" i ask.
his expression changes slightly.
"i don't care, do whatever you'd like." he says.
i look at him in confusion but he doesn't even look up from his phone to notice.
damn. i'm gonna have to get used to this.
"are you okay?" i ask.
he expression remains neutral, "i'm fine, vanessa."
okay okay okay.. maybe i should just leave him be.
i slide off his bed, "i should go, i'll see you later."
i grab my purse from the couch that's in his room and i proceed to walk out.
i start to go down the stairs when i hear his footsteps behind me.
"where are you going?" he asks.
i shrug and turn around to face him.
"stay.." he whispers, holding out his hand.
i take his hand and he pulls me into a hug.
jesus christ, this is gonna be pretty difficult.

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i send damien a couple texts so that he's not worried about me.
i feel bad, trust me.. and i really did love him.. but i still love caleb. i never truly unloved him.
i'm willing to go through so much for him, and put up with everything because i really do love him.
he's fallen asleep again next to me, the sound of his breathing is so relaxing to me.
"i love you." i mumble.
he doesn't move & his breathing doesn't change.
he's still sound asleep.
i smile, "i'll always be here for you, and i don't know what the future holds.. but we've been through a lot & i'm not willing to throw all of it away. things aren't going to be easy, and you're going to have to fight through everything you're going through.. but i can only promise that i'll fight with you. i care about you so much, caleb."
i run my fingers through his hair and relax all of my muscles. i hum along to the soft music playing on his tv.
when i remove my hand from his hair, he reaches his arm back to find my hand again, and then he places it back in his hair.
i giggle & continue to run my fingers through his hair as he falls asleep again.
moments like this are ones that i wouldn't trade for anything.
it's not going to be easy, but i think we're going to make it.
my phone buzzes and i pick it up, seeing it's a text from damien.
i unlock my phone and read the text.

caleb's mind is very complex and the doctors had scheduled a follow-up appointment for him. you'll have to tell him everything so he's not lost. tomorrow i need you to meet me at the address i sent you so we can work through it. that goes for you, too.. it'll be a therapy/medical session. if you need anything, i'm always by your side. are you staying another night by him?

damn, that was a long text. nice job, damien.

yeah, i'll tell him. he's sleeping right now. i'm just trying to take things easy with him, although, it's anything but easy sometimes. i'm gonna stay one more night, if that's okay?

he quickly types back.

of course. don't forget to look out for yourself, too, vanessa. hang in there. love you. get some sleep, too. xo

i smile and lock my phone before laying down next to him.

soon enough, i'm falling asleep with him by my side.

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yeah, hello lol it's been a while.. sorry.

merry christmas eve! i'm sorry about the short chapter, i've had really bad writers block.

my brain likes to fuck around with me wtf

thank you for reading! xo

- adrianna