DISStasteful

Wake Up

-When I wake up, Don't leave me please.

...

She had to be crying cause all I could see in her eyes were red. Her cheeks remained stained and her head down. Ana'Leah was talking but she wasn't directing it toward anyone. I closed my eyes back when she glanced in my direction.

Ez I love you so much. I wish I could hear your voice again right now. You showed me that everyone makes mistakes but its the heart that has to forgive, the heart that has the weight. I should have told you about the day Nate and I kissed at the baby shower. I honestly thought you would leave me. I told him it wasn't right and that I couldn't do this with him anymore. I was wrong so fucking wrong to keep anything from you. I really hope you pull through. Ezriel for me, just pull through.

I was shocked. My heart had probably sunk to the pit of my stomach. The only reason Nate was still holding on is because they kissed. She lead him on to think they still had a chance. For the first time ever I was mad at Ana'Leah.

I groaned as I lifted my body up from the bed. Her eyes had grew wide and she was red as an apple.

"You did what!?" I yelled forgetting where I was. She jumped back when I raised my voice.

"Ez sit down. Let me get the doctor. Oh and don't ever raise your voice at me like that, if you weren't hurt I'd probably hit you." She spoke over me. She couldn't even look me in my eyes. What the fuck was really going on? I started questioning our whole relationship and everything we had ever said to each other.

I rolled my eyes at her before unhooking my IV and unattaching everything. Her eyes grew wide and she started walking toward me. "Ana'Leah you better not say shit else to me or fucking touch me. Matter of fact grab your shit and bounce the fuck out my room. Seeing you is making my wounds hurt. Much like my heart.... That you just broke.." I raised my voice again. My words made her back up a few steps. Her eyes began to water and I knew I had triggered something but she just didn't understand how I was feeling right now.

"Mhmm, uh okay. Ez I'm really sorry though. Uhmm... I'll talk to you later." She started and finished. Her slippers hit the floor and she slipped her feet inside. Instead of holding her head high like she usually did, she let it hang down. Ana'Leah was defeated and it showed.

I sighed heavily watching her leave out the door slowly. Once the door clicked shut I got up kicking shit around. Not even because the kiss but because she didn't tell me and acted like nothing every happened. SHE LIED.

...
"Ezriel the doctor is going to come look at you." She spoke to me. I looked around the room trying to figure out why she was still here. She looked around with me and sat back down. Her slippers were kicked to the side and she rested her back against the chair.

"Why the fuck are you still here?" The words slipped from my mouth. She looked at me then at the door and then back to me. "Umm Ez. Because regardless of all this craziness going on, I want to make sure your good. Plus nobody just gives up that easy. I want to talk." She muttered. I sighed and looked away.

"Nothing to talk about. You could have at least talked to me. You lied and that hurt a nigga. Real shit." I spat. Her focus was all on me like she truly wanted to know how I was feeling.

"I understand that. I promise I wanted to tell you but I knew that you would get upset. I honestly didn't mean for it to happen he kissed me and something about it for a moment made me remember what we were. Then I remembered how much time I spent with you and how much I love- ." she started.

The doctor walked in and looked around the room. She shook her head at the mess around the room and looked at my arms. Tattoos covered my arms but I knew that's not what she was staring at, she was looking for the IV.

"Ezriel why did you take out your IV and unattached everything?" She asked. I had forgot all about doing all of that shit but quickly I shrugged." Hey Dr. Nani. How are you? I'm good to yah know." I stated choking on sarcasm.

"How are you Ez? And don't be a smart ass. You look like you feel better but I always tell you looking better and being better is two different things." She said smiling. Dr.Nani was my private doctor I hired for when I use to do missions or for when I didn't want to be around a lot of people. After a while I made her my full time doctor.

"I know, I know." I mumbled. She walked toward me and began checking to make everything was together. She helped me clean and change my bandages and checked the stitches I had to get from being dragged around like a damn rag doll.

"Everything looks good Ez, just make sure you keep these wounds cleaned and that you come back on the right date. That's about it though. Do you have any questions?" She asked me with a wide smile. I laughed a little and then replied. "No that sounds good."

"Great see you in a few weeks, see you later Ana'Leah ." She added before leaving out the door. I turned my focus back to Ana'Leah again and stared her down.

"So what are we gonna do?" Was all I asked taking my eyes from her. She parsed her lips together and moved them around. "You tell me. Ez I messed up with you. You get to make the decision this time. All I can do is apologize and let you know that I regret what I did most definitely. It was wrong." She answered.

"Leave with me..." I let out. Her eyes popped open and she let a smile form on Ber face. "Leave with you where?" She questioned finally releasing a giggle. She stopped when she noticed how serious my face was. Never the less we sat there having a competition for a good ten minutes.

"I'm leaving for California. I was going to tell you and ask you to come with me but shit happened." I spoke nonchalantly.

"I..I..I don't know Ez. That's a lot to take in right now." She muttered. I shook my head.

"If your serious about moving on from Nate I don't see why not. Just admit that you still love him Ana'Leah." I stated harshly.

"Of course I still love him... Okay. But remember first that he is the father of my child and that we were together for some years. This has nothing to do with him right now." She grew irritated.

"Then why the fuck not Leah. Tell me cause something's holding you back." I argued. "No, I never said no. I just want to have time to think about it. What's so wrong with that!?" She grew impatient with me.

"Stop fucking yelling and I know you better then that. Just stop fucking lying to me damn. You would jump at something like this any other time." I implied.

"Ezriel please! Just let me think about it. Cali is a long way out. Thousands and thousands of miles. You leave me no option but to think about it. Especially since your asking out of no where." She responded kind of calm.

"Okay, okay. Just let me know in about a week cause in two weeks I'm bouncing." I assured her.

"I have my sisters funeral in a week and then I have to go out to my mother's the next weekend." She stated.

"Well let me know before these two weeks are up. You'll find the time." I replied before watching her leave out the door quickly. She was still lying to me. Only thing holding her back was Nate and maybe it was just the fact they had the baby together and he would argue but I knew something was on her mind. I just needed to know what exactly. Maybe I could help her fix it or solve it.

I just wanted to be with her, so badly.

...