𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄─𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐤𝐞¹ (𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠)

13. healing

The sound of our feet crunching against the damp earth was the only thing that could be heard as the group of us made the walk back to camp. No one had dared said a word since we had left the cliff, the cliff that Charlotte had jumped from.

I lingered near the back, a million thoughts racing through my head. What if I had been able to get out of Murphy's grasp? Would Charlotte still be alive? If I had gone with Clarke and Finn in the first place would Charlotte never had run from them? What if-

"Stop." It was Bellamy's voice that caused my train of thought to cease. He had been at the front when we had initially left but had somehow ended up at the back.

"What?" I asked in confusion, my eyes looking up to meet his.

He glanced at me for a moment before adverting his eyes back to the forest, "Stop blaming yourself."

"I'm not." I lied, kicking at a twig near my feet.

"You've had the same pained look on your face for the last 20 minutes." he argued, looking back down at me.

"You've been watching me for 20 minutes?" I teased, trying to take the attention off of myself.

Bellamy ignored my previous comment as he spoke again, "Remember what you told me earlier tonight? That this wasn't on me? Well the same goes for you. Charlotte made that choice to jump, and Murphy pushed her to make that choice, no one else. This is on him."

I sighed as I shook my head, "I just wish-"

"No Avery. There was nothing any of us could have done okay? You did everything you could have."

I looked down at my feet before nodding, "Okay." 

He watched me for a moment, eyes straying toward my neck. "Are you okay?"

Reaching up, I felt a line of dried blood from where Murphy had dug the knife into my skin. "Yeah." I nodded, bringing my hand down. "I'm fine."

Bellamy kept his eyes on me, carefully studying my movements as we forged on. The only thing that caused him to stop was Clarke yelling his name from up front. We had reached camp, meaning it was time to explain to everyone what had happened. 

"Go." I prodded, nodding up ahead. "Clarke needs you."

He didn't say anything to me, just took off toward the front of the group where Clarke was. I didn't follow, but instead hung back as the group of us entered camp, Bellamy and Clarke already calling for everyone to gather. 

A lump had formed in my throat as they explained to everyone what had happened. The image of Charlotte throwing herself to her own death played over and over again in my mind. 

No one argued with the news of Murphy's banishment, most people probably thought it was for the best. Only hours earlier, the majority of them had tried to kill him. 

Slowly, the crowd in the middle of camp dispersed, everyone moving toward their tents for another night of restless sleep. It was impossible to sleep out here, the ever-constant threat of Grounders looming overhead. 

My friends and brother had disappeared at some point, but for once I didn't follow. Instead, I followed after Bellamy who had made his way toward the outskirts of camp. 

He was leaned up against a tree by the time I reached him, his head in his hands. I remained silent as I approached, my only tell being the twig that snapped under my feet. 

Bellamy's head shot up, his hand instantly reaching for his gun that no longer held any bullets. Despite me knowing that the magazine was empty, I could help but feel my heart skip a beat as I stared down the barrel of the weapon.