Broken

• Chapter 141 •

- CLEMENTINE -

I wake up with an odd feeling, a new feeling. It's as though a weight I didn't know was on me has been lifted off. I stumble towards Ashton's kitchen and pause at the doorway. His back is to me, and he's squatting down to Vanessa.

"Where does it hurt?"

"Right there," Vanessa winces as Ashton examines her foot. "Ouch, don't touch it!"

Ashton sighs, "If I don't get it now, it'll hurt even more. Straighten up little soldier, you can do this."

Vanessa nods and shuts her eyes. "Ready?"

She nods profusely, "Ready..."

Ashton removes whatever it was poking her foot in one swift movement. Her eyes pop open at the momentary pain, then go back to normal.

"See? Did that hurt?" he asks as he stands.

She shakes her head, "Not that much..."

He kisses the top of her head, "You did it. I'm proud of you."

Studying Ashton right now feels different. Something is different. I've finally let him in completely... He knows everything. And I don't know how to feel about it. Last night was intense, he held me all night and made sure I was okay. I've never been that vulnerable around anyone in my life, and he didn't judge me. He didn't run, he just... Held me.

My heart beats abnormally, the butterflies in my stomach feel like they're on acid. I watch Ashton high-five Vanessa and a new sense of admiration dawns on me. I'm left breathless. I look at Ashton, really look at him. My heart thrashes violently inside of my chest that I'm scared it's going to rip right out. He wraps a bandage around Vanessa's foot as she yaps in his ear about some kid on her football team she doesn't like.

He smirks at her with the left side of his lips, that's good. That means he's entertained. Smirking to his right means he's annoyed and wants to bash someone's head in. I blink. How closely have I been paying attention to him? My throat tightens as I keep staring at him like a complete freak, trying to figure out what's making my heart go crazy.

He hasn't noticed that I'm in the kitchen, and he continues talking to Vanessa. I shake my head to myself, willing myself to snap out of it before I start walking in. It takes less than I second for my stupid knees to give, and I fall. What the hell is wrong with me? I need to go check out my knees.

Ashton hears the loud crash and automatically looks back to find my stupid ass on the floor. He snorts and helps me up, "Be any more clumsy, will you?"

I open my mouth to respond, but it runs dry. Nothing comes out. Heat creeps up my neck and my hands begin shaking, what the fuckidy fuck is wrong with me? Is this what happens when people open up? Why would anyone ever do it? This is such a strange feeling.

"Need a hug?" he grins. My throat closes up as he engulfs me in his arms.

My heart is beating furiously, and I'm embarrassed because I know he feels it. We break apart and I stagger backward. He catches me before I fall again.

"Woah..." I don't think he's talking about me falling. I blush in mortification.

I clear my throat, "Uhm, yeah. That would've been bad, hah."

Phew. Steady voice.

"Are you okay..?" he looks dazed. I realize that his hands are still on my shoulders and my body stiffens at his touch as if I've never fucked him. What the fuck, body? Explain yourself at once, please.

"Yeah! Great! I'm great, mhm!"

Please. Be any more enthusiastic, Clementine. He gives me a strange look, carefully letting go and turning towards Vanessa. "Okay, why don't you take Clementine into the living room and wake up Zach while I finish up these pancakes?" he tells her.

Vanessa nods and tugs at my arm. I follow, frowning in confusion. I look back towards him as he scoops some batter into the pan. And then it hits me like a ton of bricks. Oh, God. How could I have been so stupid?

How could I have believed for a second I'm not completely and utterly in love with him?