Chapter Forty Two

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Asteria sat beside the window, staring out at the view of the beach and the pier

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Asteria sat beside the window, staring out at the view of the beach and the pier. Whilst she wished more than anything to be back at Hogwarts, the one thing Hogwarts didn't have was the vast open ocean and glorious beaches.

Lily had been staying over for the past week as Asteria knew she wouldn't be able to see Sirius until school resumed. She ruffled the newspaper and held out the front page of the Daily Prophet for her to look at.

"It's getting worse." Lily stated as Asteria took the page and read over the headlines. Over the summer, various muggle born witches and wizards had been going missing. The Ministry Of Magic was saying this was due to an evil wizard that was on the rise but they wouldn't reveal this wizard's identity.

Asteria felt a cold wave of fear flood over her as she looked at the numbers of missing people and how this mysterious figure was slowly but surely gaining lots of support and followers. Except this wasn't like joining a school club. These followers would kill for their leader without question. Asteria felt sick. "You don't think they'll come to Hogwarts, do you?" She looked up at Lily.

"Not with Dumbledore around. As long as he's at Hogwarts, we're safe." Lily spoke with a confidence Asteria only wished she possessed. She'd written a letter to Sirius confessing her worries about missing muggle borns and not only her own safety or even that of her parents, but the safety of Sirius in a home full of people that would most likely support this pureblood supremacist.

"Plus they'll have Aurors out looking, won't they?" Asteria set the paper down, not wanting to look at it anymore.
"Of course, the Ministy may be scared but they're not stupid." Lily replied.

Asteria sighed, "We should hide this paper before my parents see it. They'd never let me out the house if they knew what was really going on in the wizarding world."
Lily nodded and tucked the Daily Prophet away in her bag and out of view.

"Ria? Who's that out there?" Lily sat beside her on the window sill. Asteria peered down to where Lily was pointing and saw a familiar, shaggy silhouette walking towards the house.

"Is that Black?" Lily leaned forwards and narrowed her eyes.

"Why would Sirius be here?" Asteria frowned.
"Well he wouldn't be here for me, would he?"
Asteria stood up, "Wait here, I'll be right back." She said before leaving the room and leaping down the stairs to leave the house.

"Sirius?" Asteria's face lit up as she dashed towards him.
"Hey... Ri..." He greeted with a half-smile as he pulled her into a hug.

"What're you doing here?" She laughed.
"Nice to see you too." Sirius muttered, rolling his eyes jokingly.

Then her eyes landed on his bag that hung loosely from his shoulder.
"Sirius?" She asked tentatively.

"I know this is kind of... Well, really sudden." Sirius pursed his lips.
"You... You didn't?" Asteria's face faltered as she stepped back.

"Ria, you don't understand. I had no choice. My mother read whatever letter it was you sent." He explained, already knowing what her facial expression meant.

"I'm sorry. So sorry. I didn't mean for that to happen. Really I didn't." Asteria shook her head as she frantically apologised.
"Ri, it's not your fault. Really, they had it coming. I couldn't stay there any longer. The whole thing was abusive." Sirius reached for Asteria's hands as she finally looked him in the eye.

"Wait..." Asteria's voice was almost a whisper as she pieced together what was about to happen.

"Don't suppose I could stay? Just for summer. I'll find somewhere else to go after but I don't really have any money or anywhere else to go." Sirius dug his feet into the sand. He really didn't want to have to ask for help but he was desperate. The only person he'd willingly show this sort of vulnerability to was Asteria. Little did Sirius know she was about to accidentally question that trust.

"Sirius, are you sure this is the right idea?" Asteria questioned quietly.

"What do you mean?" Sirius dropped her hands.
"I mean... They're your family. Doesn't that mean something? I really think you should think this through, before your mum officially banishes you." Asteria suggested.

"Ri, you don't understand." Sirius shook his head defiantly, "I can't and I won't go back."
"I know I don't understand, I'm glad I've never gone through what you have but-"

"No." Sirius glared at her, "You don't get to do this."

Asteria's breath got caught in her throat as she looked up at him. The boy that stood in front of her now was not the usual cocky yet relaxed and carefree soul she had grown to adore. In the space of a few minutes he had become almost scary in his sudden anger.

"Sirius-"

"You don't have any right to question whether or not I should go home. I made that choice. It was my choice. You don't understand and you never will." Sirius snapped, "Sure your parents don't like you, but at least they'll never look at you with disgust. Your parents are just scared."

Asteria froze. Sirius saw this as clear as day and instantly regretted the words that had fallen from his lips. How time had changed since he was screaming at his mother about how he loved Asteria. Now, in a moment of stubbornness and anger, Sirius thought that she would never hear those words from him and he didn't dare apologise. It wasn't like she was going to apologise either.

"My brother called you a liar. Regulus said you lied to me and at first I thought he was wrong. I remember when Lily took you away to tell you a secret, a secret that you haven't told me about. Aren't we meant to be all honest and open with each other? And there's the book. Regulus said something happened to your grandfather's book. Is that what Remus knew about? Why wouldn't you tell me?"

Sirius was overcome with all that had happened to him in the space of a few hours. Not only had he gone through the emotional trauma of running away from home, he was coming to terms with the fact that the one person he turned to in his time of desperation was perhaps not who he'd expected her to be. Sirius was angry at his parents, he was angry at Regulus, he was angry at himself. Yet Sirius couldn't stop himself from taking out this rage on Asteria.

"Sirius, I want to explain." Asteria pleaded.
Sirius rolled his eyes, "It's a bit late for that."

She couldn't do this anymore. She didn't have the energy to argue with him and her mind was running at a million miles an hour. Asteria's mouth finally caught up with her thoughts as she muttered, "Go home Sirius."

"I've got other places I can go." Sirius could feel the tears threatening to burst down his face as he turned on his heels and stormed off down the beach. He hoped with every fibre of his being that Asteria would, as usual, be the better person and call out after him. But sometimes people get hurt and no matter how much they want to do the right thing, they still need to spend some time just being upset.
So that's what Asteria and Sirius did. Even though they wanted nothing more than to apologise for everything they'd said, they didn't. Perhaps it was their stubborn attitudes, or overriding fear. Whatever it was, they would suffer for a long while after.

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