TEARS FROM THE MOON

Chapter 18.

I wasn't aware of anything else.
Not the chimes of sheer delight coming from my Mother, although I was sure they were there.
Nor was I aware of the grumbles that undoubtedly came from my Father.

No, the only thing that was upper most in my head at this precise moment was what Alan had just announced.

Oh my goodness!
He was actually going to be playing my love interest in the film.
I swallowed hard as my insides churned around so uncontrollably I thought, that I would be sick.

Why hadn't I even considered that possibly?
I mean Alan Rickman was an actor, first and foremost not a talent scout!

But my mind was now in a kind of turmoil.
If he is playing Jonathan Saunders, according to the script I had read, there are some very intimate scenes to play out.

The garbled conversation that was going on between my Mother and Alan had now become muffled as the only thing that my mind could possibly process was the fact that I would now be required to kiss Alan Rickman!

Oh sure, I knew it was would only be acting, but I would still have to do it like I had done with poor Marcus!
But unlike with Marcus, I would be required to do other things as well.

Oh dear God!
Those other things meant that I had to play some extremely intimate love making scenes with him.
I mean HIM of all people.

My fingers were now twisting uncontrollably on my lap and I now felt really hot and sweaty.
I needed to get some air........and quickly.

Scraping my chair back noisily across the tiled kitchen floor, I was up on my feet in an instant and wobbled slightly as I stood up straight.
I lightly put a hand on the table to steady myself and noticed that the excited chatter from my Mother had stopped very suddenly.

" Are you alright Darling?". She asked, noticing my sudden movement.

I took in some deep breaths, not daring to look at Alan as I did so.

"I'm fine". I lied.

Mother was now staring at me closely.
She could obviously tell that I wasn't and I was very aware that Alan was looking at me also.
I moved around the table, quite deliberately, trying to regain a little bit of composure and to stave off the feeling of wooziness that threatened to take over me.

I took in a deep breath.

"Look, If you don't mind......l.......must go and see.....you know". I said to her.

Her eyes widened.

" You mean.........you haven't seen him yet?". She asked in shocked surprise.

I shook my head as I had now managed to leave the stability of the kitchen table and make my way towards the door.

"No......we came straight here you see, so I haven't had the chance to go and say hello yet". I answered.

Now with my hand on the door handle, I turned and looked at Alan, who still had some food left on his plate.
He was looking at me with a mixture of slight concern and bewilderment on his face.

"I won't be very long". I said to him, quickly turning away and opening the door.

As the cold, fresh air greeted me, I heard my Mother saying:

"She always says that! She'll be ages talking to him. Another cup of tea Alan?".

I took another deep breath.
I felt awful just walking out and leaving Alan there with my parents, but I had to get out. I had to take stock and think things over.
After all, I had received quite a shock!