Not an update, just an explanation (I'm really sorry)

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Sorry for updating like this. I wish I had a better social media platform to talk, I'm sorry. If you'll allow me to explain things a bit, because you've all made this fanfic so special for me... I have reached out and talked to a few of you.

Even just reading your comments I was so overwhelmed, but in a good way. I don't hate writing. I've always been scared of sharing things online and I think that magnified after what happened last year.

Writing this is my coping mechanism, and without it, everything hits me and suddenly I can't eat, sleep, and have stayed in bed for about 2 days... because I've never talked about what happened. But talking to a few of you and listening to how much you enjoy this story... it really warms my heart. I'm sorry for being an author to talk about my life so much on a fanfic, and I'm sorry for this explanation. I don't want my readers to carry a burden that I should be dealing with.

Hateful or rude comments do affect me, much more than they really should, and I'm scared of them, which made it so hard to even upload this story in the first place. But now it's become such a big part of my life, and I honestly think that without it, and without you readers, I wouldn't be here. Especially with what happened last year.

So thank you very, very much. From the bottom of my heart. And even those words feel inadequate. Maybe deciding to discontinue my fanfics was too overdramatic. I was so hurt, I guess I didn't think right. But! I've decided. And if you're still reading this, then thank you, and sorry for making it so long... I'll give it a week. Give me one week to gather myself and if I update, I update. And if I dont, i guess I don't. Thank you all. This is already too long, so I'll leave it here. I'm sorry. No more of these chapters that aren't even updates. I promise. Okay? ;; I love you all.

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