Fourteen| The Let Down

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Santana

to Javi: I don't even know where to start

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to Javi: I don't even know where to start. There's so much I want to say to you. I just realized the last time we spoke was when you were in Houston years ago. You probably don't even have the same number but there is so much I need to get off of my chest. When you left me, my heart literally broke and you took a piece of me with you. Ironically, you left a piece of yourself with me. Losing our baby felt like I was losing you all over again. All I wanted was the best for you. I hope you found happiness. I never did.

"San," Megan said, capturing my attention as I sewed in my client's hair. I had been zoned out all day. My mind was all over the place. Once I read that text to Javon, I could not keep my mind in the present. A bunch of what if moments were floating through my head. Our child would be seven years old right now.

It had been a few months since I thought about our baby but now that she was on my mind, it was hard to shake it.

"You good?" Neka asked. "We were talkin' about your birthday trip. Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah. My mind is just in another place. I'm excited tho." I flashed the most genuine smile I could muster but I really wasn't feeling it. My birthday was in five months but I was making sure everyone was prepared. Everyone needed to have their ducks in a row because I was about to be on ten when we hit the Vegas strip.

I hated traveling with people that wanted to eat McDonalds or some regular shit we could eat back at home. If you don't have the funds, please do not take a trip with me because I'm tryna live like the rich and famous. I own a successful business and I'm gonna enjoy the fruit of my labor.

"I still think we should go to Cabo." Megan whined.

I started chuckling. She had been talking about that destination for the past year. "We should definitely go on a trip for New Years. Bringing it in layin' on the sand sounds fun to me."

My best friend started smiling. "Yes bitch. Sand all in my booty cheeks. I'm fuckin' with that." She said, scrolling on her phone. "We should make it a couples trip."

Shrugging, I continued to work on my client's head. "That's cool with me."

It had been days since I ran into Javon at that gas station but that didn't ease my mind or my gut. Easton could tell something was off but he was trying his best to give me my space. I knew for a fact that wouldn't continue to be the case. In an hour, we were going to visit the preschools Auri picked out and I was really hoping my mind could focus on the task at hand.

"So what's goin' on?" Megan asked, walking into our office.

I sighed and sat behind my desk. "Bitch I'm stressed."

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