Eleanor

Dear Diary: Is it Worth it?

Hello loves, I'm sorry this has been awhile so I hope you enjoy it.  

As always it's 20 comments and 30 votes for the next update.  If that goal is reached by 6pm eastern time tomorrow, I promise that I will do a double update tomorrow night! That's a promise!

Enjoy!

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Dear Diary,

I'm sorry I haven't written in awhile but I've been busy, getting everything packed up at home and returning to Manchester for the new term.  You never realize how much stuff you actually have until you have to pack it all up into just a few bags, it's quite mad.

School has been off to a good start so far, although the strangest thing happened today.  I received an email from the Chancellor's office asking for me to come in, that they had a few questions for me.  Something about them getting bombarded with emails and calls wanting to know if I was really a student at the University of Manchester.  They also mentioned that people were wondering if I was a 'real' person.  Of course I'm a real person! I'm going into the office tomorrow to hopefully get this rubbish sorted out, I'm just so confused to why it's happening.

And that's not even the last of it.  I was telling Max and my mate Robyn about the email and Robyn pulled out her phone and started asking me about my new Twitter account.  I told her I didn't have a Twitter account and she then showed me that there are fifteen Twitter accounts all claiming to be 'Eleanor Jane Calder.' How do these people even know my middle name?  And why would anyone try to fake being me, a normal person?  She also showed me "#EleanorCalder " where there were at least twenty or more pictures of me at the concert, getting Starbucks, or walking to class. Pictures I never knew even existed.  I know I keep saying this, but why would anyone do that, I'm just me.

Am I not normal me anymore Diary?  Did I give up being just normal everyday boring life Eleanor when I started dating Louis?  Is this my life now? People wanting to know if I'm 'real,' pretending to be me online, taking pictures of me that I'm not aware of?

I keep thinking about it, if Louis is worth it, if giving up my anonymity is worth it.  I never wanted to be famous, even growing up when all my friends would talk about wanting to be pop stars or movie stars, I never fancied the thought of it.  I just wanted to be me, I wanted to grow up and live a life where people didn't judge you all the time like they do with famous people. I know it sounds lame, but I'm, okay with that.  And now everything I wanted seems to be slipping through my fingers all because of one boy, but one boy, who I am falling madly in love with.

Is it worth it?

I don't know diary, for the first time in a long while, I honestly don't know.

XO

Eleanor

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Thank you for reading and I really hope you enjoyed it!

I would love to know what you thought so please leave a comment and please vote. 

Remember 20 comments and 30 votes for a new update and maybe even a double update, depenting on how fast this chapter gets them.  

Thank you all for your love and support, it means so much to me with everything going on in my life. I love you all with all of my heart! Thank You!