Sinful Heart : Pride [Jookyun]

Sin 21

The cries from the younger have finally died down. Jooheon have made him sit on the couch, and Changkyun didn't bother standing to go back to his room. The cell he dwells in. He felt exhausted, he didn't think he has the energy to lock himself back up, again. He only curled up in a ball on the cushions of his couch, shivering at the cold as his bare skin was exposed to the cold room. Shivering, he took the pillow of the couch and hugged it to himself. 

He yearn to hide away. 

"Kyunnie," Jooheon calls out softly while a smell of food hit the nostrils of Changkyun's. His stomach grumbled, awakening from the scent that lingered around him, now wanting attention. The younger peeked his face from his pillow, and the blonde gestured for him to sit up, Changkyun did as he was told without any protest. However, his stomach protested and grumbled loudly, his starvation finally not silenced. 

His mouth have started to water, and he licked his dry lips to calm his own self. Jooheon sat beside him, mixing the fried rice around with soy sauce. Changkyun reached out but Jooheon teasingly recoiled making the younger look at him with wide, exhausted eyes. "Ahh," Jooheon opened his mouth, a small smirk brought along his lips. Changkyun scoffed but opened his mouth, and the blonde gladly fed him. 

Chewing the food in his mouth, he savored the taste and he felt his stomach twist when he swallowed. Pain strike his stomach, and he hung his head low, baring the pain. Jooheon looked at him, concerned, reaching out to the younger. "Are you alright? Can you not eat this?" Jooheon questioned, worry evident in his voice. Changkyun shook his head, "I just haven't eaten. I will be okay."

The blonde nodded with clouded concern, and continued feeding him. As minutes passed, the pain finally subsided and Changkyun ate with peace. Fulfilling his stomach, and finally taking care of one of his cravings. "Are you thirsty?" Jooheon reached out to the cup of water on the table, and Changkyun watched. Looking over, Jooheon smiled at the innocent expression on Changkyun's face. He was exhausted, hell he was also, but the younger looked cute like a puppy. 

Changkyun took the glass, thanking him softly, and bringing the rim of the glass to his lips. Sipping the water, the coldness rushed down his throat. Jooheon placed the empty plate on the table, watching Changkyun drink the glass of water as though his life depended on it. Finally, the younger finished his meal and felt slightly energized. 

Jooheon didn't want to small talk. He wanted to get everything out of the way. 

"What happened, Changkyun?" 

The younger looked at him, the memories playing in his mind, leaving a foul pang in his heart. He looked down with guilt, and he did want to tell him. But, if he did, Jooheon would be angry. 

"Changkyun, I may have heard it from the others, but I want to hear it from you." Jooheon already knew what happened, and he isn't going to act like he didn't for the sake of guilt tripping Changkyun. It wasn't his intention. His intention was to fix things not fuck everything up, again. 

Surely, it pissed him off to think about it. But, Jooheon didn't want to explode while not knowing the truth. Taking advice from Kihyun, he didn't want to jump to conclusions. 

"I'm sorry," Changkyun choked out. His tears were long gone, he was incapable to create more crystals. He have cried several minutes ago, he can't cry, again. His eyes only stung, and his voice was cracking. He truly was sorry. He could feel the blade against his own neck as he was ready for execution, he knew it was going to hurt. "I-I... D-Don't know what happened. I-I woke up in his bed, and I..." he hung his head in shame. 

It was the pride that have been destroyed. Although, it was locked away, Wonho seemed to found it and killed it with his bare hands. Not only Changkyun was suffering with the guilt of cheating, he felt disgusted by his own body. He was used. He was a rape victim. It was a horrible feeling, and he felt at fault. He was the first to encourage drinking while alone with Wonho.