46. Explanations

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Finals. The one and only thing thing that stood between me and graduation. In reality, I could literally fail every single test and still pass my classes but I wanted to make a lasting impression with my transcript so of course I was studying harder than was necessary. "You know all this already" Lucas laughs, cycling through my flash cards with me for the thousandth time since he got here. I groan, tossing my stress ball into the air before catching it as it falls back down. 

"I just want to make sure it's cemented in my brain before tomorrow."

"Babe if you study any longer your brain will short-circuit" he argues, tossing the note cards onto the ground. I gasp, sitting up and staring at the mess on the floor. 

"Lucas!"

"What?" he asks, turning onto his side and placing his hand on my hip. "You need to relax, studies show that there is such a thing as over studying."

I look down and him, raising an eyebrow. "And what do you suggest we do with my parents downstairs?" He rolls his eyes, pushing me back onto the mattress while he maneuvers his body on top of mine. 

"You could learn how to be quiet" he smirks causing my mouth to drop in. He had never complained about my noise level before. 

"I-I am not loud" I stutter, shoving him playfully. He laughs, nodding his head. 

"Sorry princess but you're loud as hell" he argues, slipping his hand underneath my shirt. "But I think you could quiet down with a little practice" he adds, leaning down and pressing a series of kisses down my neck. My eyes flutter shut and I clutch the material of his flannel at the hem, dying to pull it off. My neck tips back allowing him better access and despite my protests a rather loud moan slips past my lips causing my boyfriend to chuckle as he pulls away from me. "Riles" he tsks. 

"What?" I whine, biting into my bottom lip. "I can't help it."

"Just think about what would happen if we got caught; it's a great motivator." I giggle, rolling my eyes at him as I reach back up for another kiss but this time a knock on my door causes us to pull apart as the door creaks open. 

"It's past ten" my dad informs us while Lucas stands awkwardly across from the bed. I sit up on my elbows, bringing my bottom lip between my teeth. 

"Kay" I reply simply, hoping he doesn't question us. My dad stands in the doorway looking between the two of us until finally Lucas clears his throat and grabs his coat off the edge of my bed. 

"I should get going" he says awkwardly, stepping towards me and giving me a quick peck. "I love you."

"Love you too" I reply, watching him walk out my door. His footsteps disappear and the front door closes signaling his departure and I look up to find my dad giving me a disapproving look. "Just say it" I sigh, sitting up all the way and resting my hands between my legs, picking at a thread on my comforter. 

He closes my door and walks towards my bed, taking a seat beside me. "It was never that I didn't like him."

My eyes widen as my gaze flickers up to meet his. I was expecting a lecture not a heart-to-heart. I honestly couldn't imagine what he could say next but admittedly he had my full attention. "You have to understand Riley-." He pauses, releasing a deep sigh. "You're my only daughter. The only child I have left. When we moved here you weren't yourself, you were a shell of the girl that I knew and I was constantly terrified that I'd never see my little girl again...and then you meet Lucas. Suddenly you're acting like yourself again but at the same time you're different. Suddenly, you didn't seem to need me or your mother anymore or want us for that matter-."

"I wanted your support!" I exclaim. "I know that watching me fall in love was hard for you. I understand that I'm your little girl but dad" I pause, taking his hand in mine. "I'm seventeen years old. I'm going to college, I'm moving out, and I'm starting a life with someone and I know that that's going to be hard for you but you have to let me grow. You cannot hold me back from experiencing life because Auggie lost his. I miss him too and I wish he could've lived long enough to experience the type of love that I share with Lucas but he wouldn't want us to hold back on experiencing life because he can't."

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