Wanted

•Past Becomes Present•

{•Unedited•}

~Bex's POV~

Zav runs his fingertips up and down my bare spine, causing goosebumps to make an appearance on my skin. My head rests in his chest, my hands tracing the outline of the tattoo that meets just at where his jeans would hang. The blanket is the only form of barrier we have, our bodies naked and tangled together. We've been laying in this position, him playing with my hair while I trace his tattoos, for the last thirty minutes; thirty minutes never felt so good.
"Can I ask you something?" He asks, breaking the comfortable silence. I nod, looking the wall tiredly. "Do you think we would have made it this far if you stayed with me?" My fingers stop their tracing once he asks his question. Moving out of my position, his eyes meet mine.
     The thoughts has crossed my mind before. The whole time I was back with Atticus, there was an unsaid tension between us as well as them. Not wanting to start anything, I never mentioned it. Everything usually clears itself.
     Maybe if we had stayed together we would still be today. There were no problems between us. We were good to each other. We understood each other. There was an emotional connection as well as a physical one. That emotional connection never left and I'm half convinced it never will. There's a pull between us and there's no point in resisting.
     It's weird to have someone in your life that affects you like no one else. His laughter has the strange ability to make me feel warm and bubbly inside. The way he looks at me makes me want to cover myself and flaunt myself to him at the same time. My heart beats faster than it should whenever we're around each other.
I'm in love with this crazy psychopath.
   I don't know if it was his lips against my forehead or the small amount of red wine coursing through me, but I did. He drag me to the ends of the earth and I would probably go with little hesitation. Why did it take me so long to realize how fucking helpless I've been for him? Am I the only one who hasn't been able to see it?
"Why are you staring at me?" He asks, moving his body just a tad to look me in the eyes. The absence of his lips in my head leave that spot feeling cold. His hand rests on my stomach, making slow, delicate creases.
"Because I love you."
   "You love me?" He asks, sounding confused. His brows are now pulled together in concentration, eyes searching. I could be tripping myself out, but I swear, I see tears in them.  
    "Yeah, it just took a while to realize it," I say, feeling much more confident in it now. He blinks at me, not saying anything. "It's not that hard to believe."
   "For someone like me it is," he says. "I-I've alone my whole life even if I'm surrounded by people. My parents favored Atticus over me while things were normal. My sister doesn't hardly talk to me unless it's necessary. I-I didn't think I was capable of being loved."
    "You are."
   ••••••
~Atticus's POV~

I don't know what lead me here of all places. The past few days have been hard and confusing. I'm confused with myself. Thinking about it now I would never accept to help with something like I did. Tearing a family apart is one of the worst things a person can accomplish and I did that to Bex.
Her dad and her were just starting to mend their relationship and she would go on and on about how happy that made her. I put away the man who raised her into who she is, who shaped a good majority of her personality. And Alaric, who was always there for her no matter what. That's who I regret the most. He never did me wrong or anyone else. Bex must be a mess without him.
I tried calling her yesterday and her phone was turned off. I left a voicemail as pathetic as that may sound. The ride home from the station, I couldn't grasp what had happened. We had just got our footing back in place, we were as good as ever, and I went and fucked it up.
She said that if I had warned her she wouldn't of been as mad, and I believe that. The thought never crossed my mind. I thought even if I told her I got gotten on the case before we were anything she would have my balls twisted in ways I don't wanna imagine. Seeing her cry how she did broke my heart. I'd seen her cry before, many times, but it was different. All her emotions were aimed at me in that moment and there was no way for me to ease her pain. I betrayed her and I wouldn't be surprised if she never spoke to me again because I don't deserve it.
I'm well away of how much I fucked up my chances of ever having a future with her. I've always been a go getter, someone who puts their sights out on something and doesn't give up until they reach their goal, but I'm giving this one up. She deserves to be happy whether that be with some random guy or my brother again. He's probably already swept in to save the day.
"Look what came back," a very familiar voice says from behind me. I turn around to see Liv walking over to the waters edge next to me. You know that feeling where you're not sure if something is real or not? Or like you've seen a ghost? That's this feeling.
I haven't seen her since the night I hit her. She was gone by the time I hit back and cut off all communication. Seeing her smile almost seems wrong with how we left things.
"Liv," I say, picking myself up from the ground where I've been sitting for an hour looking at the water and overthinking. She smiles brightly up at me, her blue eyes still like aquamarine crystals.
"I never thought I'd see you again. Especially here," she says. I haven't come back to my home town in almost a year. It's only an hour drive, but I had no desire. Once I left, I never wanted to come back. Her voice is soft just like it was when we were in high school. People used to make fun of her for it, but I found I adorable.
"I didn't think I'd be back either," I admit. She leans against one of the trees. "You still come here a lot?" Why is the conversation coming so easily? Shouldn't I immediately start stuttering an apology to her for what I did?
"Whenever I can find the time. It seems I'm always either working or sleeping," she says. I nod, looking away from her. "So what brings you back after all this time?"
I can't go straight into pouring out my emotions about Bex and the breakup to her, so I don't know what to say. This wasn't what I expected to happen when I came here, so I didn't come up with an excuse for my return.
"Just getting away to do some thinking. I couldn't think of another place," I say. She nods, her wavy blonde hair falling to her back. Some parts are now darker than others. There's a long pause between us, the only sound the rustling leaves and water. "I'm sorry."
    "For?" She asks, her brows pulling together. Did I hit her so hard that night she doesn't even remember? 
    "F-for hitting you, that never should have happened," I say. Her eyes move to the ground, staring at the dirt like it's confusing her. "It's crazy to think of what could have happened."
    "We had been engaged," she says, a smile on her face. I take a deep breath, nodding at the memory of purposing. We had a dinner with her family and I asked for her dads blessing before taking her home and asking her. I had been cliche and scattered roses around with fake battery powered candles from the Dollar Tree.  
     "No one knew yet," I say, running my fingers through my hair. My eyes meet hers. "I'm so sorry." The corners of her mouth tilt up into a beautiful smile. It was always the best thing about her, constantly lighting up the room.
    "There's no reason to be sorry. I moved on from it. I wouldn't be sitting here reminiscing with my ex fiancé at our old make out spot if there was a reason to be sorry."
She's always been too forgiving and kind for her own good. There was a boy who would bully the hell out of her for no reason and she never held a grudge and made sure to bring an extra pencil because he never brought one. She shouldn't have forgiven me and part of me wants her not to.
    "So, enough with the mopey "I'm sorry" stuff, why are you really here?" She asks. She knows I wouldn't come back even if it were the last place I could go.
    "What I said, thinking."
    "About?"
    "A really bad situation and it's all my fault, so I'm not sure how to fix it or even if I should," I tell her without giving too much detail. She sits down, staring out at the moving water. Usually, it's at a pace where it's safe to swim in, but if someone were to do that today they'd be swept away.
    "With a girl?" I nod, feeling weird talking to her about another women. She doesn't seem to have a problem with it. "I fucked up really bad."
    "As bad as with me?"
    "I helped in a case to arrest her dad, the man that raised her, and her cousin who is her main support system," I admit. Her brows raise.
   "So a lot worse."

     AN: I'm gonna just end this here. Just a little heads up, after the next chapter there will start to be a lot of time jumps. The reason for this being that I want to get everything that I want written into this story before I end it. I hope that's not too much of a bug because I understand that some people don't like those. Anyways, I really hope you guys enjoyed!
     Question: What do you think about Liv? Would you like to see them back together?
    PS: Liv has been added to the characters page!