i forgot the melody • 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙠𝙤𝙤𝙠

𝓲𝓯𝓽𝓶 VI

I crossed my arms and rested my back on the soft couch. Chesca left to fix herself on the comfort room, of course she would like to look very presentable for Jeno. Insert an eye roll emoji.

Meanwhile, I played with the rim of my drink and stared at it like it's the most precious thing on earth. I am in deep thought.

Sighs after sighs, finally I went back to my consciousness and like the usual Lucy that I am, I looked for Jed.

The last song always hits different, to be honest. Especially with the golden voice of the golden boy. This night was another level of a banger, though. Lost in Love by Air Supply is something I'd sing to him, to be honest.

I should be happy that for the first time in forever, my crush looked at me while performing, isn't that a good thing? But no, I felt indifferent. Why? Why all of a sudden?

It got me thinking, does he know that I like him? In fairness, I never admitted it to him, I only told Chesca about it and she swore not to tell a single word. Must be true because anyone from the band doesn't suspect a thing.

And it can't be helped that Jed is dense af, he doesn't see things that romantic. He never went out with a girl, he's a very quiet and reserved person, I never stuck my nose and asked Chesca about his personal reasons for being private like that so I don't have any idea. Whatever it is, someday, I hope he'd share to me.

"Yo Lucy doozie!" Luke greeted me, alongside the other GEUX members, except Jeno and Jed that isn't with them.

Luke is the drummer, he's got a very jolly smile, almost angelic. Among everyone in the band, Luke is the social butterfly, he knows everybody, he's friends with every groups in school. To be honest, he brought the light to GEUX, he played the major role of putting them where they are right now.

Beside him is my known friend Finn Hemmington. If Luke's the social butterfly, Finn is the stan attractor alongside Jed. If they're a Kpop band he could of passed as a visual easily. He's got an attractive pair of eyes, it's brooding. His face is often described as perfect because it seems unreal. Before GEUX happened he was always pitted against Jed because they both played soccer in 7th grade, both was interested in archery, swimming, and different school activities. The thought of him having beef with Jed disappeared in an instant when they were spotted together every lunch break. Almost immediately, they were the school's favorite duo.

"Sup Lulu." And there is the bassist Charlie, he's the laid back cool big bro I wish I have. We were acquaintances before GEUX was formed since he used to date my long distance friend Kylie. He's quiet and loves to be alone. After gigs he usually stays backstage or straight to home, I'm guessing he's persuaded him to stay a little longer.

My eyes of course is looking for Jed, they don't seem to notice that and sat on our table. I bet Jeno's with Chesca. Although they just started going out, I think what's going on between them is something that will last. Jeno's a sweetheart and so is Chesca. The best thing about them is they compliment each other. Chesca's a breathe of fresh air for a strict Jeno.

"Ha. I want a love life too."
Luke whined while drawing circles on the table. I went curious.

"How dare those two leave us for girls." I got chills. Two? Jeno and Jed?

"Shut up weirdos, y'all should get your own." Charlie hushed them and gulped on his beer.

"I'm lost here, who are we talking about?" I tried playing it cool although my heart is beating on rampages. I secretly clutched on the leather couch and bit my lip, a little hard that I tasted some metallic liquid.

"Jeno and Jed, those two are so fast with girls but is very secretive." Luke even pouted.

"It's no fair. Especially Jed. Who knew that kid got a girl?"

"Who?" I asked almost eagerly that it sounded suspicious, I hope they won't notice.

"I don't know, I just heard him talking to the phone. The voice is familiar but I'm dizzy that I can't remember." Hemmington said then fiddled with his phone, obviously tipsy with his eyes almost crossing.

Who could Jed be talking with? My grip on the couch tightened. The thought of him talking with somebody else hurt me in ways that I can't comprehend.

"You know he's like that, he doesn't even tell us about the person he writes music for."

I didn't pay attention to whatever Luke said and stood up fazed, mind clouded, and a heart confused.

"I need fresh air." I briefly bid and walked towards the backstage which I assume where Chesca is. I want to go home and borrow her car because I didn't bring mine.

I didn't notice the droplets of tears streaming down my eyes. I'm hurt this much?

I kept the pain of being ignored to myself for quite some time because I thought, there's still a chance, but now that he's seeing somebody? What are the odds?

I opened the door silently and instead of Chesca, I saw Jed, his back faced to me on his phone talking to someone.

"I'm sorry. I know. I'm trying my best." It stabbed me in the heart, he sounds heart broken. Who's this girl? What did he do to him?

"I don't know.. I'm trying. I'm trying everything." I can't hear whatever the other line is saying, I can only hear a faint girl voice. And it frustrates me even more.

"No, I won't. I chose this." His voice changed, he stood straight and pulled his hair.

"I'm tired..." His voice crooked then he  turned his phone off and threw it on the velvet couch.

He squatted and put his head on his arms, the view broke my heart into pieces. I want to comfort him. I want to go near him, hug him and tell him I'm here for him, but how? When he's breaking down over somebody that is probably his girl?

I flinched when I pushed the door a little hard and it made a loud creak. Of course it made Jed's head shot up. He stared at me like he's saying "unbelievable." I know. We always collide but you always try to repel.

"Did you heard everything?"
His voice is small that it made my knees weak.

"Would you like if I heard it or didn't?"

He sighed and sat at the couch, he tapped the couch gesturing me to sit beside him. And like the whipped, in love Lucy I am for him, I obliged.

My heart is aching, it feels like knots are forming on it and I can do nothing. He's in love, huh? With another girl. With—

"It was mom."

—his mom...

wait what

HIS MOM? My jaw fell and I secretly rubbed my eyes to make sure everything that is happening is real. It is!

"I'd like to pursue my dream." He looked at me, his words spat with conviction and a hint of fear.

"Because I just built my courage recently, and I want to use the heck out of it."

This time there's no fear, only the glimmering doe eyes of Jed telling me he's willing to fight. For whatever it is? Only heaven knows.