Bad Boy Summer

t w e n t y

I GROAN AS I roll over, only to end up smashing my knee against the inside of the door. 

"Ah fuck!" I hiss out as my eyes open in fright. Bright light floods my view and I end up blinding searching for my sunglasses. I end up finding Chase's and put them over my eyes. 

After I had calmed down, I slowly glance around and take in my surroundings. We had stopped at a gas station somewhere along the road to home. Chase obviously had run into to get some things from the shop. I had been sleeping most of the trip and I felt really bad because I was suppose to drive back. 

Chase didn't seem to mind. He was just so damn great and I, in the most simplest way, was not. 

I was so fucking pissed at Chase's grandfather for getting to me so easily, for literally bribing me to break up with Chase. Thomas was an asshole, but I was more angry at myself that I somehow thought breaking up with Chase was my way of controlling things.

I might not be able to control external forces, but at least I could control what happens to others because of me. I didn't deserve to love Chase or to be loved by him. But I did and I felt fucking selfish because of it. I shouldn't feel like this. 

I just wanted to be with Chase and I wish it was that easy. But nothing ever came easy for me because karma was a bitch and she just loved fucking picking on me. I bite my lip as I sigh out and rest my head back against the chair; my brain currently experiencing life at fifty wtf's per second. 

Do I risk it. Do I get back with Chase knowing damn well his grandfather won't like that. That he'll follow through with his threats by pulling Chase out of university and firing him from the Architecture firm? I couldn't believe a grandfather would do that to his own legacy. 

But I've had my fair share of fatherly-figure assholes so I wasn't that shocked. 

Chase would be left with nothing. I would've single-handedly ruined his life and I would feel nothing but shit. Would he blame me? 

Probably. 

I felt like crying again. I run a hand through my hair and let out another frustrated sigh. I thought this would be easy. I thought staying away and keeping him safe would be a walk in the park. But it was very much not a walk. It was more of a crawl-on-my-hands-and-knees-while-the-ground-is-made-of-fucking-quicksand through the park. Oddly specific but it felt like exactly that. 

The driver's door opens suddenly, "Okay! So I got oreos a—" 

"Fucking cheeseballs!" I jump in fright as I flail back against the door. 

Chase shouts in fright, frozen in the middle of climbing into the car, "What the hell!?" 

"You scared me you asshole." I breath out as I clear my throat and calm myself down while taking his sunglasses off my face. Chase stares at me in silence for a few seconds before laughing and continues to manoeuvre himself onto the seat, "How about knocking?"