Mine {Book 1}| Completed

Chapter 27: Are We Over?

Chapter 27: Are We Over

          C H R I S T O P H E R: 🥀

The movie was almost two hours long. And on my mind I couldn't even pay attention or focus on the film in front of us as we sat in the theater while it was dark. And as it was dark with the old classic of 1968's Romeo and Juliet. Right beside me was April. The girl I'm supposed to adore and admire and love. But here I am hiding the truth from everyone including myself of how much I'm cheating my feelings. My feelings of loving Emma. I love Emma too much it is making me insane. How am I not to stop thinking about her? She's in my mind constantly.

    Emma is in my head before I go to bed and when I wake up. It's making me go crazy. And I feel like I'm insane. But maybe that's what love does. April wanted this so badly. But I'm sitting here...wondering what am I doing sitting here in a movie theater with my suppose girlfriend and not at home kissing Emma? How am I still sitting here? Why am I? Why am I hiding from the truth? And today I wasn't respected by how Peach treated me. In fact, I think she loved the way she spoke to me. I saw her being a jealous slithering full on bitchy snake. Worse than April could be. And April isn't perfect. But Peach acted like she could tell me what to do. But she wasn't wrong.

    If I were to end things with Emma it would destroy her. And I don't wanna see her get hurt. Peach doesn't know what I have with Emma. She just threw awful insults at me. And god knows what she said to Emma. And I just wish I could get out of here and just go and be with Emma. Why am I addicted to the girl who I'm not supposed to love? But I love her no matter what anyone says. But I can't dump April because we just got back together like a week ago. And it wouldn't be fair. We slept together and then after we just got back together. I wish I had never done that. And now I'm just stuck in this challenge. But I gotta stay with April. But I'm terrified of my own stepfather. Peach is right about him. If he finds outs about Emma and me...he will kill me. And then I'll lose Emma. And that is what terrifies me. So should I end things with Emma because of this? Is Peach right? Or am I overthinking?

    While sitting in the dark theater, I just felt bored. April had tears filling in her eyes. She had a box of tissues. Other people in the theater were sobbing or people came as couples and they were making out. April tore my attention away from anything else.

   "Babe," she grabbed my knee. "What's wrong?" She softly asked.

   "Nothing. Nothing." I shook my head, bringing my arm back around her and she took at least two fingers of popcorn from the bucket and munching.

  "Want any?" She offered. "It's got great butter."

   "No, thanks." I shook my head.

I was still trying to figure what I'm supposed to do. When I'm with April I feel like I'm hurting Emma. She's probably hurt by me that I'm not home with her. I guarantee she's home by now stuck in her room...reading To Kill a Mockingbird. And so, I'm here with April who I've fell out of love with the second I decided to be doing the secret relationship with Emma. And Emma is constantly in my head. What am I doing? I wish I never agreed to get back together with April. The only one I should have is Emma. And I don't care about anything Peach said to me.

April looked over me that struck worry. And she saw me and that worry definitely gave her some sort of idea.

"Are you okay?" She leaned ever so close to me.

I swallowed my fear. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You look very distracted." She whispered to me.

"Not at all." I shook my head.