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CHAPTER THIRTY TWO

DEREK CLIMBED THROUGH haven's bedroom window, seeing her curled up on her side as she stared blankly at the wall. he frowned when sensing the sadness coming from her.

he kicked off his shoes and jacket, climbing into her bed beside her as she scooted back to make room. he got under her covers and wrapped his arms around her small frame. he traced circles on the skin of her back with his thumb, feeling her relax under his touch.

they both laid in a comfortable silence although derek knew the she was seemingly bothered by it. he looked down at her face, the moonlight glowing on her skin. a glistening tear shed from her eye but neither of them moved to wipe it away.

"do you want to talk about it?" he asked quietly, bringing his hand up to play with the ends of her hair.

"i don't know." she whispered, closing her eyes as more tears trickled down her cheek.

"is whatever bothering you the reason why you avoided me today?" he asked, wiping the tears from her cheeks as he stared at her with a sad look.

she nodded, lifting her head to look up at him. "i saw my dad earlier today."

derek said nothing, not even knowing what to say. so all he did was tighten his arms around her, holding her securely and comfortingly against him as she silently cried into his chest. he left a lingering kiss on her forehead, tilting his head to rest his upon hers.

"i–i thought i would just see him and would be fine, you know? i would go and get the closure that i needed and get the abandonment papers so i could get adopted. but i don't know anymore." she whispered, her voice cracking as slowly craned her neck to look up at him.

"i thought he was in prison?" he looked down at her, staring the glistening tears brimming her eyes.

she shook her head, "he got out a little over a year ago."

"and you're considering going to live with him?" he asked, raising his eyebrows in slight shock and confusion. "why?"

she sat up, crossing her legs as she looked down at her lap. "it's not that simple, derek."

"yes it is! he's been out for a year and didn't even think about coming for you when he did! do you think that's what a father does?" derek questioned, sitting up as well and staring at the back of her.

she inhaled sharply, turning to glare at him. "there are reasons!"

"oh yeah, like what? tell me a good enough reason for a father to not even care enough to get his daughter back!" he said in a demanding tone, intensely staring into her eyes.

she felt taken back, shock taking over her features before hardening with anger. "get out."

"what? no."

"derek, get the hell out of my house!" she snapped, glaring at him with burning tears in her eyes.

he stared at her for a moment before standing up, slipping on his shoes and jacket. he glanced at her one last time, seeing her with her head down and her hair covering her face. it didn't take an expert to know she was crying.

he sighed, leaving the house full of guilt.

•••

haven sat down next to jackson up against the lockers, stretching her legs out in front of her. "free period?"

"no. i just didn't feel like going to chemistry." he simply replied and she chuckled. "feel like i haven't talked to you in a while. what's going on?"

"well, i saw my dad yesterday." she said, leaning her head back against the locker. "and he signed the abandonment papers so i could get adopted."

"that's great, right? i mean, that he signed the papers?" he asked, looking at her.

she nodded, "yeah. but, a apart of me wishes that he didn't sign them and would fight for me. it was good for me to get closure though."

"isn't he in prison though?" he questioned, giving her a confused look.

"no," she gulped, looking down. "he got out a little over a year ago. at first, i was angry because he didn't come for me. but then he told me why."

"well what did he say?"

"he said he planned on getting me back but he needed time to get back on his feet and have enough to be able to provide." she explained, crossing her legs as she folded her hands into her lap.

"a part of me will always want to be with my dad. but i know i belong here." she continued, glancing at him. "anyway, enough about me. what's going on with you?"

"well, i broke up with lydia." he told her, looking at the lockers in front of them.

"how come?"

"she's just so... i don't know... way too needy and only interested in her status. which is why she ended up dating me. because i'm captain of the lacrosse team." he explained, shaking his head as he let out a sigh.

"have you tried telling her how you feel?" she asked him.

"she only hears what she wants to hear." he told her, turning his head to look into her eyes. "besides, i have feelings for someone else."

they both stared at each other, the atmosphere around them changing. jackson glanced around her lips for a split second, making her swallow hard. a breath got caught in her throat as her heart rate slowly accelerated.

she snapped back into reality and turned her head, so he was looking at the side of her face. "i–i should probably go. i'll see you later."

she gave him a small smile before standing up and walking down the hall. she turned the corner and pressed her back to the wall, a heavy breath leaving her mouth.

her phone vibrated in her pocket and she furrowed her eyebrows, pulling out her phone and seeing derek's name flash across the screen.

"hey," she answered, twirling the ends of her hair with her fingers. "i figured you would be mad."

"i would never be mad at you. i shouldn't have said what i did, i'm sorry." he told her, already calming at the sound of her.

"it's fine." she whispered, feeling somewhat guilty which made her confused.

"can i see you tonight?" he asked.

"tonight i have plans. how about right after i get out of school?" she suggested.

"yeah, that's fine. see you after." he told her.

"bye."

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