moonlight.

45

☾

CHAPTER FORTY FIVE

THE LIGHT GREEN eyes that belonged to derek stared into haven's big brown ones that were dull, vacant of expression. her face held a neutral expression, one that made derek feel a bit uneasy as he knew she was holding in the anger she was feeling toward him.

"if you want to scream, yell, or hit me you can. i deserve it." his voice came out and quiet, looking down as he picked the wood from the picnic table they were seated on.

she opened her mouth to speak but quickly closed it, pursing her lips together as she glared at him. she crossed her arms over her chest, cocking an eyebrow at him as she silently told him to explain himself first.

"i only sided with my uncle so i could kill him for killing my sister. i knew if i got close to him, it would be easier for me to follow through with my plan." he explained, bringing his eyes back up to look at her.

"you knew killing him took away scott's only chance of being human again and living a normal life. why would you be that selfish?" she questioned, trying to make her voice stern but it came out softer than she had wanted it too.

he swallowed hard, breaking his stare on her. "i don't expect you to understand, haven. you don't know what it's like living this kind of life."

"i don't care what kind of life you have," she snapped, her words slicing derek in the chest. "i want to know why you couldn't let scott kill peter so he could be human again and be with allison."

"he killed my sister! he killed the only family i had left and he planned it. i'm sorry for wanting his power and wanting to get revenge on what he did." derek told her harshly, his eyes darkening as he sent a glare in her direction. "the only thing i'm not sorry for is falling in love with you."

haven's heart suddenly picked up at his words, warmth flooding through her. she stared at him in shock, tensing up slightly at his sudden confession.

"when i met you, i didn't know what i was getting myself into. you understood me and gave me a feeling i had never felt before. you made me feel for the first time in six years." he muttered, keeping his eyes locked on her. "i knew i was being selfish when i kept myself involved with you."

she furrowed her eyebrows, giving him a confused look. "what do you mean?"

"i would do anything just to keep you safe. to protect you. that's the thing, any other threat that may happen will use you because you're human. being involved with me is dangerous." he said quietly explained, looking down to avoid the pain expression on her face.

she took a moment before responding, "so, you wanna end things between us?"

his head immediately shot up at her words and vigorously shook his head, "no. i don't ever want to have to end things with you. i just think i'm being selfish because being with me will hurt you."

"derek, you're not selfish. you're not being selfish. having feelings for someone isn't selfish. if i couldn't handle it, i wouldn't still be here would i?" his lips twitched slightly as a small smile formed on his face.

"you're amazing, you know that?" he spoke as he climbed over the table to sit beside her as they both turned around and faced the water.

"i mean, i guess i am." she smirked, resting her head on his shoulder as he dropped an arm around her.

he moved his fingers into her hair, twisting it around before pulling it back gently. he took this opportunity to connect his lips with hers, capturing her in a soft yet tender kiss. she smiled against his mouth, bringing her hands to rest on the sides of his neck.

his hand dropped to her lower back, pulling her body close to him until she was pressed up against him. just as started deepening the kiss and things became heated, she pulled away, bringing her forehead to rest on his shoulder.

"i'm sorry for disappearing for a while." he mumbled, stroking her hair with his hand. "i should've returned your calls and messages but, i knew you were upset with me."

"i was angry. i didn't know if you were okay or not. and i had nothing to say after your little chat with scott and peter." she told him, now resting the side of her head on his shoulder.

he pulled his eyebrows together, wondering how she would know about that. "how do you know about that?"

"after the game, i went looking for scott. i overheard the conversation." she mumbled, twiddling with her thumbs. "that's why i was mad."

"i'm sorry." he whispered, leaving a lingering kiss on her head.

"and i needed you in my corner after i couldn't get adopted." she finally told him, lifting her head to look at him.

"why couldn't you get adopted?" he asked gently, rubbing her back up and down soothingly.

"i have a different father listed on my birth certificate." she sighed, looking down at her lap. "the sheriff."

derek's eyes went wide, staring at her in shock. "the sheriff... as in..."

"stiles' dad."