moonlight.

47

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CHAPTER FORTY SEVEN

A HARSH GASP ripped through haven's throat as she jolted upward, sweat lining her forehead. her heart pounded viciously within her chest walls, her blood running cold as she tried to forget the nightmare that felt incredibly real. she touched the back of her neck, her hot skin cooling down from the coolness of her hand.

a large hand grabbed onto her arm gently making her flinch and turn to look down at derek, his eyes flooded with tiredness. "you okay?"

she sat still in slight shock, her lips parted as she tried coming back to her senses. she swallowed hard, calming her breathing as she slowly laid back down. her eyes stared up at the ceiling, unable to fall back asleep.

derek moved closer to her, wrapping his arms around her. he held her close to him, burying his face in her neck as he breathed in her scent. she was radiating anxiety and was trembling slightly, making his chest ache in pain at the state she was in.

"haven, talk to me." he mumbled, propping himself up on his elbow to look down at her. "please."

she shook her head, closing her eyes as she turned her body to face him. she hid her face in his chest, clutching onto him to avoid the concerned look he had on his face.

"can you look at me please?" he asked quietly, resting his hand on her cheek and moving his thumb back and forth soothingly.

she moved her head, looking up at him through her dark eyelashes for a second before quickly turning away. he held a pitied look in his eye, one she wished she never saw come from him.

"don't pity me please." she mumbled, hiding her face in his chest again and closing her eyes.

"well, can you at least tell me what happened? did you have a nightmare?" he asked, frowning as he rested back down on the pillow.

"the first time i dreamt about my mom in a long time." she whispered, tightening her grip on him. "i keep thinking i got over her death after i stopped having nightmares about it. but i guess i'm not."

"oh, my love." he sighed, holding onto her securely as he kissed her forehead. "it's okay if you're not over it. some things are just hard to get over. it's okay, haven."

"that's not the whole reason. it's just, i lost her so quick and didn't have time to process it. i think i'm more afraid now because i love you and i don't know what i would if i lost you." she whispered, looking up at him with glistening eyes as tears began to form.

he froze, her words repeating in his head. it took a moment for her to realize what she said and her eyes widened, making her curse to herself mentally and instantly pull away from him.

"i–" before she could finish what she was saying, derek yanked her back down, kissing her softly.

his wolf was howling in pride, feeling extremely affectionate and content at the three words she said to him. he felt his heart thumping quickly in his chest, mixed emotions running through him but he was sure of one thing and one thing only.

"i love you, haven. and i'm not saying it because you did, i'm not saying it to make you feel better," he whispered against her mouth, pulling away to look into her eyes. "i'm telling you i love you because i do. i am truly, madly, and deeply in love with you."

she smiled widely, a tear escaping her left eye and he quickly moved to wipe the tear from her cheek. "it wasn't until i met you that i could trust people. you taught me how to trust someone and made me feel like i matter. i'm so lucky to have you, derek."

he said nothing, only staring at her lovingly before leaning forward and kissing her once more. he slowly and subtly moved to hover over her body, trailing his hand up her bare thigh and underneath her shirt to rest it on the curve of her waist.

haven's hand trailed to the bottom of his shirt, tugging lightly which made him pull back. she helped him take it off, revealing his toned and perfectly sculpted torso. she let out a needy whimper when his lips came crashing down onto hers again, the kiss full of need and lust.

once haven allowed derek to remove her shirt from her body, goosebumps formed quickly at the sudden coldness to her bare skin. but she was then quickly warmed when derek's warmth covered her, pressing his body against hers.

suddenly haven grew extremely insecure when derek's eyes caught sight of a long scar along her rib cage. she knew what he was staring at and quickly tried backing away from him but he stopped her.

"so beautiful, so fine." he whispered, slowly bringing his head down to press his lips against her scar where he left gentle kisses along the mark.

hotness pooled within her as his lips began moving to the center of her stomach before moving up, kissing between the valley of her breasts.

"do you want to go further? we can stop if you want, i don't want to pressure you into doing something you don't want to do." he whispered, staring down into her shining eyes.

she slowly nodded, "it's okay. i want this. i need you."

knowing she was really sure about this, he connected his lips with hers once more before removing his jeans, dropping them on the floor.

"all mine." he whispered.