Conquering the Barriers

Kabanata 9

At least

"Yara!"

I was brought back from daze when I heard my seatmate called my named.

Dahan-dahan kong binaling ang ulo kay Andy. Bahagya pa akong nag-aalangan dahil ngayon ko lang siya narinig na tawagin ako.

There was no humor on her face though.

"Sabi ko, pakitabi nung paa mo. Gumulong kasi yung ballpen ko, hindi ko maabot dahil nakaharang ka." paasik na sabi niya.

Nagparte ang labi ko habang pinoproseso ang sinabi niya atsaka lumingon sa sahig para makita ang tinutukoy niya. Bago pa man ako makagalaw ay nagsalita na ulit siya.

"Pulutin mo na nga lang!" utos niya.

Napalunok ako bago tumango. Mabilis kong dinampot iyon atsaka inabot sa kanya. Marahas niyang tinanggap iyon atsaka umirap.

"Ano ba 'yan, lagi kasing tulala eh." bulong niya pa ngunit sapat lang para marinig ko.

Napakurap-kurap ako sa mabilis na pangyayari. Nang makabawi ay binalik ko na lang ang tingin sa kabilang gilid. Hindi ko maiwasang muling mapatitig sa kawalan habang inaalala ang nangyari kahapon.

The euphoria, the rush, the bliss. Even the magic it made me feel. Just.. everything about it. The feeling was like I'm on seventh heaven. That's how good it was.

Kaya handa na sana ko. Handa na 'ko kung papagalitan niya 'ko dahil pumuslit ako. Handa na 'ko sa kung ano mang magiging kapalit ng saglit ngunit tumatak na kaligayahang iyon. Kasi sulit naman. Sulit na sulit. Walang makakatumbas.

The odd thing though is that he didn't say anything. I am expecting him to but.. he didn't. He didn't say even just a single word about it.

There was no sense of hostility in him too. I was carefully observing his every reaction since this morning but there was none.

Hindi niya talaga ko pinagalitan o pinagsabihan tungkol dun. Ni walang bakas ng pagkalukot ang mukha niya. I think he was even more pleasant than usual.

I tried to recall what happened. I'm sure he saw me. I'm pretty sure he did. Our eyes met. They definitely met. I'm certain about it.

I didn't force myself to think too much about it and chose to just shrug it off. I can just think of it as a good thing right? After all, I already got so much on my plate. I don't want to create my own problems even more.

"Good afternoon, class."

Napabaling ang tingin ko sa harap nang pumasok na ang guro para sa last subject na General Mathematics. Umayos na rin ako ng upo at bahagya pang pinilig ang ulo para makapagpokus sa klase.

I diligently took notes of the discussion. Ang mga sinusulat na solutions ng guro sa white board ay kinopya ko rin nang detalyado.

I stiffened when I saw Ms. Fuentes pulled out the set of our index cards inside her bag. This could only mean one thing. Recitation.

"Alright, let's have someone answer this practice exercise." she said while shuffling the cards.

Napalunok ako. Silently praying for my name not to get called.

Don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't understand the lesson. Ayoko lang talagang mag-recite dahil ayokong pumunta sa harapan. Hindi ko hinihiling na huwag mabunot dahil tingin ko'y wala akong maisasagot. Bagkus ay dahil sadyang nakaka-nerbyos iyon para sa katulad kong walang kumpiyansa. Iniisip ko pa lang na lahat ng atensyon ay matutuon sa akin, tila nanginginig na ang tuhod ko.