Conquering the Barriers

Kabanata 12

Only man

I was still petrified on my feet.

Even after I sensed Frida and company leaving the room.

Even after they've been summoned out.

Even after a couple of seconds have passed.

My nerves are still palpitating like crazy.

My heart was pounding really hard in my chest as its rate continuously accelerates.

Ang mga mata ko ay walang malay na nakapako sa anino ng nakabantay na pigura ni Sky sa labas.

Tanging manipis na kurtina lamang ang namamagitan sa amin. Hindi sapat para maharangan ang mga salitang namumutawi mula sa bibig ng mga nasa labas.

"Pati sa likod lubak-lubak si Yara kadiri,"

"Oo gago kita mo 'yon pati sa balikat may mga tigyawat."

Their effort in making it seem like a whisper was evident but my ears may have liked being tortured that they only choose to hear the most painful remarks.

Their small voices transform into loud echoes inside my head.

"Tapon ulo na nga tapon katawan pa,"

"Wala pa kamong laman utak,"

"Meron naman... hangin nga lang,"

Their wicked chuckles filled my ears. Their sly comments together with their heinous laughter crawled into my being.

I was sweating heavily. Drips of sweat are strangely getting out of my skin even though I wasn't even moving. I'm experiencing shortness of breath too. The sensation was suffocating.

Their horrified and disgusted expressions from earlier keep playing on my mind. Ang naabutan kong mga mapanghusga at nandidiring mata nila ay hindi maalis sa imahinasyon ko. Kung paano lumukot ang mga mukha nila sa pagkasuklam habang nakatutok ang tingin sa akin ay yumayanig sa kalamnan ko.

Nanghihinang bumagsak ang mga braso ko sa magkabilang gilid nang may mapagtanto.

I am never going to get accepted. I am never going to be accepted by these people. By the society. By the humanity. And I will never be normal. I will never be able to live normally. As long as I look like this. As long as I act like this. As long as I'm ugly. As long as I'm weak. As long as I am me.

There's no chance for me.

Just.. never.

Not in this era.

Not in this existence.

Not in this lifetime.

I picked up my uniform with wobbling hands. Wala sa sariling sinuot ko ang mga iyon habang tulala.

I only have one thing in mind right now.

One thing that could put an end to everything.

As soon as I finished putting on my uniform, I opened the curtains and instantly took my steps rapidly. Not minding anyone. Not even Sky who was caught off guard by my sudden move.

My pace was charged with speed. I wouldn't want their shady eyes to linger over me any longer. Until I didn't even realize that I was already running. Running out of that hell. Running out of that nightmare.