Our Parents Pain Came With Love

Chapter 4

AYANDISWA BESS

I don’t know how I feel about what mom just told us. I love my parents both of them but maybe I’m a daddy’s little girl more than I am a mommy’s girl and honestly I’m disappointed in my father because this is the last thing I expected to hear about him, from him. I am brought back to reality when Miso touches my knee and I look at him

“mh?”

I raise an eyebrow

“Anything you want to say?”

Yaya asks and I shrug

“I don’t know mom, I think Yanga’s reaction is justified. I mean what if I came home to you one day and told you the person I am married to raped me, how would you respond? Would you advise me to leave him? Or maybe stay with him? I mean it would be hypocritical of you to tell me to leave him. By staying, it looks as though you support what he did to you mom”

I spit out, this angers me more than I thought. Yes Derrick Bess is my father but what he did is inexcusable.

“Please excuse me”

I say and then get up and storm out. I need to breathe. I call my boyfriend, Roland Noland. He’s an IT student and really smart too. He tells me he’s on his way. I cant spend the night here. I’m walking down the street, I don’t even know where I am going but I know I cant be home. I just keep walking until a car stops beside me

“You ok?”

The person in the car asks but I don’t respond and keep walking, the person drives next to me. His speed is reasonable and now I’m scared because he’s not going away, I spot Roland’s car approaching and I sigh in relief. He stops on the other side of the road and I cross quickly to him, he gets out and pulls me into his arms. I hear the car speed off judging by the screeching of the tires. Please understand we live in a quiet neighbourhood where houses are far apart and theres trees covering the road from people’s yards. Yes rich people like their privacy more than anything, you cant even find a taxi that comes this side of town. He leans on his car brushing my back as I try and calm down, he breaks the hug and then pulls me away from holding me at arms length

“Talk to me my love”

He says in such a gentle voice that tells me everything will be fine

“Its my parents”

I say, he raises an eyebrow waiting for me to continue. Do I want to tell him what happened? Can I even trust him with this? I mean my father and mother have worked really hard to build names for themselves here in the states and if it were to come out that Derrick Bess once raped his wife then best believe it would ruin him. Yes I may hate him at this very moment but he is my father and I cant have such news come out about him. 

“They…”

I think of a lie real quick

“They fighting and it seems bad. I’m worried about them Ro”

I say and he pulls me to him again

“Your parents love each other, whatever they are fighting about they will get through it I’m certain”

He says confidently as if he knows them, maybe he knows them based on what I’ve told him about them.

“Its ok”

He says brushing my back. When I’m finally calm he pulls me away from him

“Should I drive you home or you want to spend the night with me?”

He asks

“I want to spend some time away from home. Please take me to your place”

I say and he nods and opens the door for me, I get in and he closes it and then heads to his side. He drives us to this other ice cream joint drive thru I love so very much. He gets us ice cream and hands it to me then drives off, he hasn’t said much ever since he picked me up and that’s what I love about him, he doesn’t pry or force me to talk when I don’t want to. I hand him his ice-cream and he feeds himself while he drives. We get to his place and he parks the car and we both get off. We go to his room and I walk in and throw myself on the couch.

“Can I get you something to eat?”

He asks

“No thank you Babe”

I say that switching on the TV.

.

.

-MELOKUHLE BESS

I never thought a mistake I made 21 years ago would come back and bite me in the ass. It feels like I’m losing my family to this and it hurts me because til date I crucify myself for what I did to my wife, yes she forgave me and I should have forgiven myself already but I cant. I cant undo what I did, I don’t regret Yanga but I do regret the surrounding of how he was conceived. Seeing my son this hurt and angry pains me and theres nothing I can do to make things better, Kyle was always the reasonable one of all my kids while Yanga and Aya are as stubborn as their mother and I are. 

“Dad we cant change the past, what happened happened and I’m glad you and mom worked through it and are here today.”

Miso says after Aya’s storming out. I wont lie I am worried about her and as much as I wanted to run after her Yaya held my hand to stop me from doing so, instead she got up and left for the kitchen then came back after a while

“One of the guards will follow her”

She says brushing my knee

“I have homework so may I please be excused?”

Miso says getting up, Yaya nods and he leaves. That is one child of mine that does not have a temper or is stubborn like his brother and sister. He and Kyle are what one would call chilled and neither Yaya or I are like that so it has to come from Asemahle or my parents. After Miso leaves Kyle asks that he leave because he has a lot of work he needs to do, Yanga gets up and leaves us in the room

“He’ll come around”

Kyle assures me, I wish I could believe him. My son has a temper, and he has my stupid pride so chances are he wont come around anytime soon

“Thanks son”

“Talk to your mother Kyle”

Yaya reminds and I chuckle

“You my mother, what do you want to talk about?”

She throws a pillow at me and I duck

“you know what I mean idiot”

She says, Kyle gets up when Yanga walks into the lounge. Yanga doesn’t say anything to his mother or myself.

“Bye parents, see you when I see you”

Kyle says and they both leave