Always Together✔️

Chapter: 113

I am trapped in a whirlwind of emotions... emotions that are connected with Alec. A war is raging inside me, which is not ready to settle down.

I do care about him, maybe more than I can express. However, I don't know about love. Maybe care has taken the place of love.

I just don't know.

The thought of something happening to him scares me. He matters to me, always did, and always will.

Since Alec has got back into my life, things are getting more complicated for me. I am not like my old self, yet I feel different around him.

Day by day everything is just becoming so overwhelming, the more I think about it, the more confused I get.

Why my mind keeps on thinking what if nothing would have changed between us, what if we have just stayed friends like we used to be. Maybe then he would not have left me... maybe then everything would have been fine.

Sometimes, I wish I never had fallen in love with him. At least then, I could have been with him when he needed me the most.

My thumb hovers over his name, as I contemplate whether to call him or not. I want to talk to someone. Who am I kidding? I want to talk to him... but then I don't know what to talk.

Lying on my side, I tap his name still not sure why am I calling him. I hear the ring and hope he doesn't answer the call. On the third ring, he answers the call.

"Talk to me," Closing my eyes, I say even before he can speak.

For a few moments, I just listen to his silent breathing... but still it's comforting.

"Are you alright?" He asks.

"I don't know... maybe I am." A small sigh passes my lips, "Honestly, I don't even remember how it feels to be alright." I shrug, shifting the phone from one ear to another.

"Are you alright?" I repeat his question.

"I am... when I am with you," he answers in a quiet tone.

His answer makes me feel guilty because it feels like I am leading him on, promising him something about which I am unsure whether I am capable of doing.

"Why?" I swallow, thickly, "Why our lives turned out like this? We were happy, Alec, then why?"

"Happiness is perishable, enslave to circumstances. It can never last forever, and time makes sure of it. Life puts us in a numerous challenging situation where happiness can't survive, it just vanishes." I hear him taking a small breath. "There is no happily ever after in real life." He dryly chuckles.

"So we don't deserve happiness?" I question him, swiping my fingers underneath my eyes to wipe any traces of moisture because for some reason the urge to cry is really strong.

"No, we don't" He instantly answers, "We don't need anything which is momentary, what we should aim for is contentment. Contentment comes from inside which is not bound to the circumstances or a person, it is internal and eternal."

The silence stretches between us. I ponder over everything which he has said.

He sounds like a person who has years of experience in life, maybe in some way he has. His eyes have seen more than anyone of his age could have seen. His heart bears the pain that anyone could have only imagined.

Light rapping on the front door makes me sit up straight in bed. Still holding the phone to my ear, I walk outside my room towards the front door.

The person behind the door again knocks the door, making me frown as I usually don't have any visitors, especially this late at night.