Sanditon Season 2: The River and the Man

Chapter 46

Charlotte knocked on the Parker residence with butterflies in her stomach.

"Ah, Miss Heywood." Sidney's man opened the door. "Mr. Sidney Parker is in his study, I can get him for you."

She shook her head. "Please don't disturb him," she answered. Her stomach somersaulted as she entered and let her jacket be taken and her bonnet. "I am just here to see Georgiana."

The aged man nodded and gave her a knowing smile. "Upstairs Miss."

Charlotte left Warrick down in the foyer. "I will just wait here," he said holding his hat and refusing the footman's offer to take his things.

She smiled at him and shook knowing that Sidney possibly knew she was there but prayed he stayed inside his refuge. She was not ready to see him after their interaction yesterday.

Just as she thought that she heard his voice. "Captain Warrick." was all she heard as she rushed upstairs not wanting to be seen. She entered Georgiana's room without knocking and shut the door breathlessly and leaned her back against it.

"What on earth is the matter Charlotte?" Georgiana asked sitting on her bed reading a book that she put aside.

Digging into her pocket she handed Georgiana the letter that she just received.

"I just saw Otis," she whispered.

Georgiana opened up the inked up paper and squinted.

"He was rushed and was working when I gave him your letter. I think his heart soared to have word from you. He apologizes about the mess." she said quietly hoping they would remain undisturbed.

Georgiana read it eagerly and her hand shook as her hand went to her mouth. "Oh Charlotte." tears came to her eyes and she stood and hugged her tightly. "Thank you," she whispered. "You are the truest friend I have ever had."

Charlotte smiled sweetly and hugged her back.

"I need to write him back. Can I ask you again to-" Georgiana went to her desk and then turned. "What is it?"

Charlotte smiled. "I have been invited back to Sanditon by Lady Denham. And I long to see it so I have decided to go. I don't know where I will be after. Likely Brighton with Lady Susan."

Georgiana rolled her eyes. "What an odious woman. So you will stay with her, like, in Sanditon House?" she asked. "Why?"

Charlotte shrugged and blinked. "I really don't know why, but I suppose since Miss Brereton and Sir Edward are shunned and Lady Babington is in London I suppose she is lonely."

Georgiana rolled her eyes. "What Mr. Tom Parker and Mary are not enough company?" she was impatient. "I will find a way to get my messages to Otis," she whispered. "Do you have his address?"
Charlotte winced. "I don't, but Captain Warrick will know. I will write to you and send you it when I can."

Georgiana went to her drawer. "Use the two penny post," she said handing her the funds.

Charlotte took it. "Alright. I will send you tomorrow morning."

Taking her hand Georgiana felt a tear drop down her face. "You are leaving me again." she accused. "I wish you would but stay."

Charlotte shook her head. "In truth, I am glad to go. The society has become difficult."

Nodding Georgiana squeezed her hand. "Please don't give up what you want."

Charlotte frowned. "I guess that is the trouble. I don't know what I want."

Georgiana shook her head. "You know what you want. You just think it is impossible."

Taking a deep shaking breath Charlotte tuned and closed her eyes. "It is impossible. So now I don't know what to want. I just like being busy, being Susan's companion has been that, and I have learned so much. But now I get to go stay with Lady Denham, I suppose I will get to learn a great deal more from her."

"Do you love Captain Warrick?" Georgiana asked directly.

Charlotte blushed. "He is handsome, but no...I am not even entirely sure I like him. He seems so dangerous and complicated."

Nodding Georgiana raised her eyebrows. "I know the type. Isn't that the way you felt about Sidney?"

Charlotte thought back and frowned. "A little, but Sidney always made me self-conscious. I wanted him to think well of me. I craved something from Sidney that I don't care to receive from Captain Warrick."

Georgiana smiled. "You still love Sidney?"

Charlotte felt her throat go dry. "Of course I do... I just am not willing to do something that will hurt so many people I care about. That is not love, that is self-interest. The situation will remain impossible."

Georgiana shook her head. "I am sad for you Charlotte. And Sidney too. I used to think he deserved being miserable... But I have since changed my mind." taking a pause she thought for a moment trying to be sure she should tell her. "He is getting married in July."

Charlotte swallowed hard and nodded. "I hope it will be a happy occasion."

Georgiana rolled her eyes. "Quit deluding yourself. He is in hell."

A tear fell from her eyes. "I am sorry for them then..."

"Don't you want to scream and throw something?" Georgiana asked.

Charlotte shook her head and wiped her eyes. "No... I just want to look into his eyes and tell him it will all be okay." she looked down sadly. "But what use would that be?"

Standing Georgiana hugged her. "He isn't married yet-"

Charlotte shook her head. "What is the point of hoping? Only to be heartbroken again?" She sat on the bed and her shoulders slumped. "I'm just trying to move on."

Georgiana smiled and laughed inwardly. "You can't move on from love once it is found. I tried."

Looking up with wet pathetic eyes Charlotte shrugged. "Then I am resigned to my misery. Hope hurts worse."