Ferris Wheel
noun
A Ferris wheel can represent something exciting or enjoyable - however it isn't consistent- there are regular pauses in this pleasurable experience.
Book 2 of the Leigh-Anne and Oscar Chronicles
Please Read ROLLACOASTER first
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I sat there,beer in hand, my body physically present at this party but my mind wasn't. Way too many things was happening and I couldn't help but blame her. Since she's moved back here, problems were arising left and right and now 19th street's started to act up which leaves me in a compromising position.
Even with that happening, my mind couldn't help but go back to what she asked me.
She wants me back? Did she really or was she just testing me? I can never tell with her. The moment she asked that question I should've gave her a quick answer, but I hesitated, no I was left speechless,not because of what she asked but because I didn't know how to answer. My heart started beating fast and I just froze.
Did I want to take her back? The answer scared me.
"Yo, Spooky you look like you've seen a ghost... see what I did there?." Chico bumped my knee and then burst out laughing at what he said.
We were at this party and we were sat in a circle,all four of us high as a kite, they were smoking for fun I was getting high to try and ease my problems,one of them was the mother of my child,the other was this gang of little boys and another possibly my girlfriend sleeping at home.
"I don't know man, I fucking hate this shit." Four blunts later and I could feel myself already levitating.
"What exactly do you hate?" Benji asked raising his eyebrow in question.
What did I hate? "This whole shit. She's back. I have a daughter. My life was doing good homes now I'm just.." I didn't know what word to use to describe my current predicament
"Confused is the word to use fool." Pablo finished and I nodded
"Confused. I-I just don't know how to feel." I sighed leaning back into the chair.
"You know what this shit is homes. This is someone you love against the love of your life. Now which one's which is for you to decide though." I rolled my eyes.
Love of my life? Who was the love of my life? Most definitely Alaïa,she's the one person I love the most at this moment,even more than I love Camilla. She was my little girl and I would do anything for her. Now Leigh-Anne was something else..a whole other headache.
"Yo Oscar I thought you said Camilla didn't like these shit." Chico spoke up and in confusion I looked in the direction he was looking at and sure enough there she was.
She stood there, very out of place looking around no doubt trying to find me.
What is she doing here?
I woke up,casually walking over to her and when she saw me she breathe a sigh of relief.
"What are you doing here?" I questioned, taking her hand guiding her inside the house. The music was too loud and I needed to hear her clearly and possibly get her to help me ease this tension in my dick.
Once we were in a quiet room she turned over looking at me.
"What do you mean what am I doing here? I'm here for you." She said in a duh tone.
"You don't like coming to these. I've tried to drag you countless of times. So why now? You could've told me so that I could actually pick you up." I shrugged.
If she finally wanted to hang around with the homies she could've just asked.
"Yeah I changed my mind." She shrugged. I titled my head to the side and studied her.
"Camilla, Please don't tell me you came here to catch me and Leigh-Anne together?" I questioned, feeling myself getting heated. The way she looked away from me confirmed everything for me.
"Are you serious? Right after I told you the dance was innocent. You came here to spy on me?" I backed away, softly glaring at her.
"I'm not going to lie to you. That's exactly what I came here to do. I-I know you said the dance was innocent but she still loves you Oscar. I don't want her to get between the two of us." She cried out. Even as she said all of this my mind was still stuck on the fact that she came her to watch over me as if I was some sort of little kid.
"You could've stayed home. Pretty sure the girls you asked to follow my every move and take pictures could've done the job for you. Or did you come here because they couldn't make it? Came to do your dirty work by yourself." I clenched my jaw furiously.
"Oscar it's not like that okay. Babe... I-I just wanted to be sure." She made a move to grab my hand and this time I let her.
"Don't you trust me?" Relationships were based on trust,communication and loyalty. I didn't see two here.
"I do, I do." She wrapped her arms around me pulling me closer.
"Then why did you have to come?" I questioned. She sighed pulling away from me.
"I trust you. But I don't trust her. I don't care if she's the mother of Alaïa,I just don't trust her. That day she bumped into me she said she isn't going anywhere and I knew there was some sort of double meaning behind it. She wants you and I can't have that." She argued.
"Why did you say stepmother? Did you have a double meaning behind that? Did you have to say it knowing how rocky things are already. I'm trying to built some sort of co-parenting relationship with her and you went in there putting emphasis on the word stepmother and she didn't like that." I knew stepmother was probably an innocent word but it didn't need to be said, it was just one of those things you kept to yourself and for her to go ahead and put that out there to Leigh-Anne of all person and for me to see how pissed off she actually was because of it didn't put me in the right position.
"It's just a word Oscar! Isn't that what I am? Her stepmother?" She questioned raising her voice slightly but with the loud music it could be heard very faintly to the others outside.
"It doesn't matter. You just don't say that to her of all person. Yes you're my girlfriend we've been together for 2 years now but Cam come on. Put yourself in her shoes." I rubbed my face in frustration.
"This. This is what I mean. Look she's already making us argue. We never fight Oscar. We were good now I just don't feel safe with her around.." I couldn't believe what I was hearing because it's been only like almost 2 months since she's been here and they've met only twice.
"Are you that insecure in our relationship that you can't just fucking trust me?" Once again she looked away from me and that answered my question.
"Camilla. I'm not going to have her move away from me and take my daughter. She was right she isn't going anywhere because I want to be in my daughter's life. So we gotta find a way to make this shit work because I'm not pushing her away." And with that I walked out slamming the door shut.
