His Flower (Rewritten)

Chapter 41

Hey guys! Got my new laptop and all my files were saved on OneDrive! Yes!

Thanks so much to whoscountinganyway for the cover above and at the bottom of the chapter! They're beautiful! She also created the newest cover for HFR! You rock! 

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Enjoy

-&-

Chapter 41

       "Sorry, Bae, I'm a little busy all week."

       "What do you mean you're 'busy'?" I grumbled into the phone and slapped my hand down against the carpet of my floor. It was the Monday of Thanksgiving Break, Tate and Luce left the day before with strict rules that I didn't plan on following, and it was the first day Rex was gone. Barely four hours in and I was already losing my mind.

       "I mean," Jax sighed and grunted like he was lifting something heavy. "I'm moving into my new place and am going to be crazy busy."

       "I can help!"

       Besides a quick call last Thursday to wish him a happy birthday, we hadn't talked much since. I was hoping this week could have been our time to catch up and get him used to the idea of Rex and the others before the dinosaur came home. I couldn't very well do that if Jax refused to hang out with me.

       "Isn't your wrist sprained or something?" He laughed softly into the phone and I glared down at the brace still wrapped around my hurt hand.

       "Yeah, but it's almost healed! I only have like two days left, so I can move stuff no problem."

       "I'm not going to risk you hurting it more." He didn't laugh, but I could practically hear his smile.

       I frowned and glared up at my ceiling. "Why do I feel like you're pushing me away?" If it was anyone else, I wouldn't dare voice my thoughts out loud. I knew I was wrong most of the time, but this was Jax. He knew everything about me, went through everything with me. And he swore he would never leave.

       "You know that's not true, Rose." Jax let out a soft sigh, but I wasn't all that convinced. "I really am busy. I wouldn't be able to spend that much time with you if you were here—"

       But the dark thoughts were already starting, the ones that kept saying he was lying. He never wanted us to talk after dad found me again. Only gave me his number for emergencies, and even then, he always kept the conversation short and to the point. I knew he said it was just to protect me, to keep that part of my life locked away forever, but he was a part of that life. And I never wanted to lose him. He promised I never would.

       Then why didn't he want to see me?

       Maybe that's what I was to him. A dark unhappy part of his life he wanted to lock away and never revisit. Only stayed somewhat around out of that stupid sense of duty he always had. Even as kids. I never thought Jax would run from the broken inside me, but maybe he had enough too.

       "I'll see you soon though, okay?"

       I hit 'end' without replying and rolled onto my side. I stared at the dark empty space beneath my bed, blinking into what seemed like an abyss. I hated the dark, but it was all I have ever known. Everyone left. Even Jax.

-&-

       I groaned at the sound of the doorbell ringing hours later. I had dragged my comforter all the way down the stairs, curled into a blanket burrito on the couch and was staring at the TV all day. The exact same thing I had always done when Luce and Tate left me alone. I wrapped the comforter tighter around my shoulders and dragged my heavy feet towards the front door.