Sparks Return [Completed]

54: The Night Curiosity will Kill the Mouse

54: The Night Curiosity will Kill the Mouse 

Emil's POV

"How are you feeling, Biya?" I asked the woman who looked like she was deep in her thoughts with the way she was just looking out of the balcony. The quarter moon brought light to this solemn night with the breeze calm but cold. I asked her to stay for the night here in case Zeke would come in her apartment unannounced. Elda would be coming here too just in case and we're waiting for her to finish her shift. 

"I don't know, Emil. I really don't know. What Zeke said... I'm thinking about it." I got nervousby her mentioning that guy. He was her past and I was also her past. I got this heavy feeling ofinsecurity that she would come back to him like the time she went back here with me now. Idon't want that to happen. 

"What about?" I asked and I could hear her sigh beside me. 

"Did you really give me that much space or was 6 months too much for us to be like this closeagain?" I went still for a second as she asked me the ultimate question. I gripped the bars of thebalcony at the attack. Did my impulsiveness get the better of me and forced her into this? Did Iforce her? Did I give her space? I thought I did but if others would see it in their perspective, didI do it properly? Yes, I did have troubles keeping my distance as much as possible and I onlywould talk to her in long conversations when her brother was the topic... I faced her with all thecourage that I have and gave my answer. 

"If you ever felt forced, Biya, I can step back and reevaluate every action that I made. If I everpressured you, I'm sorry." She sighed at my answer and faced me too. I swallowed mynervousness and looked directly at her. She's beautiful and in the midst of all the pain, shemanaged to steal my breath away. 

"That's the problem, Emil. You would come and go in my life. You physically left but I still feltyou around." 

"Did I pressure you into coming back to me? If I did, I'll step back for real. I know that no oneshould feel pressured into doing something against their will. It's not right. I-" 

"Emil. Will you stop apologizing to me for one damn second and listen to me? Guilt is eatingyou away and it's really not healthy for you." 

"And it's not healthy for us to start with something you got forced into. Biya, seriously. I want todo this right and I'm trying to learn everything here. We've got a learning curve but tell me if Ido something wrong and I'll tell you if something is wrong." 

"You freaking talked to me only when necessary. What's wrong with that?!" She exclaimed. 

"But I did mention about us a couple of times..." I recalled and I felt guilty as fuck now thinkingabout it. I was a sad fuck. 

"Yes you did but I understand now why you did that. People cope up with situations differentlyand I know now why you did that. When I told you I forgave you, I really did forgive you witheverything you did. Why would I be with you now if I don't like the situation I am in?" I wentweak with her last statement, blowing out a breath of relief before closing the distance betweenus. 

"So, you really want this? Are you sure I haven't done anything bad?" She laughed at myquestion and slapped my chest. 

"Sometimes, you can act like a guilty kid without even knowing what you did wrong. Yes! I'msure! I want this. You know me, Emil. I don't freaking stay somewhere or with someone that I don't want to be in the first place." I chuckled at that, admiring her sweet smile. 

"Yeah. You are pretty stubborn." 

"I know." 

"Can I hold you for a while?" I asked for permission, wanting to ask for permission now beforeacting on what I want.