My Weasel

Chapter 18- Tell me-

It felt like an eternity until the dreaded exams were over and I could actually relax for once. The only thing that was still slightly bothering me was Trelawney and the initials I had still yet to figure out. In spite of this, I found myself focusing on the urge to dive into the muggle novels that awaited me in my room.

Yes, another top secret of mine was that I actually enjoyed reading, especially when it came to muggle stories. As of right now I was sitting in the library reading Catcher in the Rye which happened to be one of my all time favorites. Skimming my eyes over the words, my fingers danced across the page in pure delight.

How words could so effortlessly capture people's attention never seized to amaze me. Gently licking my thumb to turn the pages that had been stuck together, I let a frustrated sigh.

"Books can be pesky that way." Remus sat down across from me, a book tucked tightly into his side.

"Not as pesky as people." I reply with a small smile and place the book down on the table

"I wonder who you're talking about." Remus sarcastically drawls and shifts his eyes past me towards the entrance. Turning around I see two flashes of red hair running away from Filch down the corridor, their laughs echoing throughout the halls.

"They are most definitely the spawns of Satan, then again what Gryffindors aren't" I remark and  lean back in my chair.

"Last time I checked, I'm not the spawn of Satan." Remus looks at me amused and my mouth gapes open in shock.

"No way Moony, you were a Gryffindor! I totally thought you were more of a Ravenclaw." I gesture to the book in his hands and his nerdy attire.

" I thought you weren't one for stereotypes?" Remus chuckles.I think about his words for a moment and let out a laugh. He was right it was a tad hypocritical of me to generalize Ravenclaws as nerds.

"You're right, I guess I can see that you have a little bit of Lion in you." I snort as he puffs out his chest in an imitation of the animal.

"I see a little bit of Lion in you as well LP" He laughs but I can't seem to find my voice. Looking down at the charm around my neck I turn it around in my fingers. Staring at me were the initials that had just come out of Lupin's mouth.

Taking a nervous gulp of air, I slowly lift my eyes to find him staring at me in confusion. His eyes glance down to what I was holding and I can hear his breath hitch and his eyes widen in realization.

"Y-you still have that." He stutters and my grip tightens around the piece of jewelry.

"How do you know?" I question in a dark tone and stare at him intently.

"I-" He breathes out at a sudden loss for words. Slamming my hand down on the table, everyone in the library looks at me apprehensively.

"I SAID HOW DO YOU KNOW!" I yell, not caring about the fact that it appeared that I had gone bloody mental. Lupin continued to remain stiff and nervous under my gaze until he finally grabbed my hand and led me out of the room. Giving an apologetic nod towards the other students, he ushered me into his office.

"WHAT THE HELL REM-" I was cut off by him placing his hand over my mouth, silencing me.

"I will explain but in order to do so, you need to let me talk." He looks at me with his eyebrows slightly raised and slowly retracts his hand.

"That necklace was given to you by a friend of mine when you were very young-" He takes a deep inhale of breath, trying to find the right words. " Those initials stand for a nickname we had given you, a nickname he had given you." He looks back at me while playing with the hem of his jumper anxiously.

"What do they stand for Moony, I have spent countless hours wondering and I can't take it anymore. What do they mean?"  Tears start to pool at the corners of my eyes, waiting for him to reply. His hand reached out and picked up the necklace, a sad smile playing on his lips.

"Little Padfoot. That's what we called you, our little Padfoot." His own eyes begin to tear and my bottom lip trembles.

"P-Padfoot?" I sniffle

"My old friend." He looks off in the distance and winces as if the memory pains him.

"Why him? Why is the only clue of my past linked to him?" I question, tears falling down my cheeks and onto the ground.

"He is your past Delilah." He whispers just loudly enough so that I can hear him.

"What's his real name Remus?" I ask, my skull pounding as the new information swirled around my mind.

"I c-an't, he made me promise." He chokes out and runs his hand through his hair.

"Please, I need to know." The only response I get his him looking out the window silently shaking his head. Seeing that he wasn't going to answer me, I stormed out of the room and out of the castle completely. Running towards the black lake, I flop myself down underneath a nearby tree.

My legs were trembling and my breath was coming out as heavy gasps. Who was he? Was he my father? Was he a friend? I needed to know, I needed to know something about myself. All of my life I had longed for an understanding of my past and it had only grew after I had been given the mysterious cassette. It finally felt like I was on the brink of discovering something, and I longed for it desperately.

Continuing to let out choked sobs I curled myself up into a ball. My cloak was wet from the copious amount of tears that had been shed. The grass slightly tussled next to me, but I dare not lift my head. Another wet substance rubbed against my arm and I quickly pulled away. Hearing a whimper I slowly peek my eye out from under my robes.

A pair of familiar warm grey eyes stared straight back at me, his nose pressed against my arm. I wrapped my arms around the dog and engulfed him in a tight hug.

"Hey Padfoot" I let out in between sniffles and buried my head deeper into his fur. The dog and I stayed in that position for a long while before I finally lift my head.Once again his grey eyes were staring at me,except this time they didn't belong to a dog.