Chapter One

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Hey guys this is my first fic so go easy on me because lord knows I have no clue what in the flying fuck I am doing. Also for context, Haley died before we joined the BAU. I know it is not canon to have her die when Elle was there but I wanted the bitch dead. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this slow burn, tropey, and wild fic I have planned.

- w/ love
1386 words
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You walked into the bullpen of the BAU at 7:15 on a Monday like it was every other day of the year. You loved working here and boy it surprised you every time. Not once has a case ever been the same, but sometimes it did get a bit repetitive.

You were brought in three years ago along with Prentiss after a girl named Elle apparently went off the rails and murked somebody. But that's just a rumor, you hoped.

This was the reason you and Prentiss were so close. The two of you were both genius newbies to the BAU and found comfort in the fact that you both consistently fucked a lot of things up when you first started.

It's not like Quantico or anything was new to you though. You grew up in Maryland, right outside of DC. Manipulative and traumatizing wealthy lawyers for parents that sent you to private school and destined you for a successful life.

Sure it was a nice life, rich boys that would swoon over you at dances, galas, cotillions, and proms. But wow it was stressful. You always were thankful for it because this was the life that got you to the BAU, but when it came back to all of this you wish life could have been a hell of a lot less painful. Possibly a life that didn't make you feel the need to completely escape, like you did.

But that's beside the point, you are a baddie who works for the BAU, you are living the best life.

As you walked over to your desk you smiled at Morgan who was talking on the phone with one of his one-night stands who got a little too attached to him. You always trusted Derek to be safe but sometimes you really thought he was gonna come in one day with an STD.

As you sat down at your desk you prepped for a day of doing nothing but paperwork as you and the team had just gotten back from a case.

You glanced over at Emily to ask how her weekend was but you already knew the answer. Smack on her neck was a poorly covered hickey, and being the bitch that you are, you had to point it out.

"So who is the suckerfish that gave you that one" you stated a little too loud on purpose, fully knowing she would not want the others to hear.

"Oh shut the hell up y/n. You know for a fact who this is from" she jokingly whisper taunted back at you

you knew it was from her on again off again guy that meant merely nothing to her. His name was like Ian or something but you quickly responded in a quiet burn. "Does her name start with a J and end in ennifer?" you said, completely expecting her to bitch slap you right then and there.

Talking about Prentiss's crush on JJ was not something you were supposed to do. It was a little bit of a touchy subject as JJ has a kid with a guy she doesn't even like that much. But she and Will were cute and Prentiss would never be a homewrecker, as much as she wanted to.

"That's not funny and you know it," she responded not mad but very monotoned. You two liked to joke about it sometimes, but you had to pick the right time to do it and this clearly was not it. You had ruined the joke again. Nice job idiot, you thought to yourself.

You settled yourself in, got coffee, and said good morning to almost everyone in the office with Rossi saying something vaguely Italian, Garcia asking you how your plants are doing, and Reid spitting out a fact about how you don't get enough sleep and it'll eventually kill you.

You did not say good morning to Hotch that often mainly because he scared you a little bit but also he never really liked you. He was always cold to you but never to Emily despite beginning at the same time as you.

Rossi once told you he had a bitch of a wife that cheated on him. you later found out that she died but you never pressed more because you felt that was rude and he probably still loved her or something

You always wished he would have warmed up to you as you continued to work there but it just never happened, and it caused you to kind of not enjoy him or his company when out in the field. It made a lot of work really tense because the two of you were always a word away from yelling at each other

You are the best that is why you are here he would say to you but for some reason, it always felt like a lie. He never treats me like the best, you thought to yourself, so why did he use to say that?

Time to get working you thought to yourself and started on the paperwork that you hated. You liked being out in the field, kicking names and taking ass. You also were a slow writer so things seemed to not go as fast even when Reid took half of your work.

But today of all days was not what you expected. Around 1:30 you lifted your head to see Strauss marching across the floor of the bullpen. Full b-line to Hotch's office.

As you looked up, you locked eyes with her and she gave you a death stare, it was quick, but it was scary enough for you to want to completely shit your pants. You knew something was wrong.

Oh shit its my time, Hotch really has had enough of me, I'm getting fired you thought to yourself evidently displaying your thoughts enough for Reid to turn to you and say "y/n you look like you are about to faint"

No shit sherlock you thought but simply smiled and said "that lady gives me the heebee jeebees. Whenever she is here something bad always happens" which in fact was not completely wrong. You had convinced yourself that she is a gremlin that only brings bad news.

Reid walked over to your desk and handed you some water, which you thought was sweet but also a little weird. You were pretty sure he had a crush on you but you never asked him for fear that it would lead him on.

Right as Reid sat back down, Strauss slammed Hotch's office door and closed the blinds. Either she was about to fuck Hotch or someone is getting fired, and either way, you did not want to know the answer.

You all looked at each other with hatred and confusion. You all hated Strauss but it was not like you could do anything about it. You make one wrong move and that lady has you canned without hesitation, so there is not much to like about her.

"I bet you 20 bucks that woman has not been railed in at least 3 years" Derek turned to you laughing.

You responded saying "and I'll pay you 100 to do her so she'll get off our backs" just to watch Derek's face look like he could throw up right then and there.

And that's when it happened, "y/l/n I need you to come to my office" you heard from across the room. You looked up and saw Hotch's stern face looking like he was about to give you the worst news in the world.

So you mumbled to everyone "see you when I'm fired" and got up and left to meet Hotch in his office, nervous to know what is happening.

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