Summer Before Fame

Chapter 4 "Soulless"

Months had went by and during those months Ms. Alice was battling with her health. Unfortunately, she lost in the end and passed away. Kentrell was devastated, and angry at everyone and the man above. He lost the smile that once adorned on his face. He put his wall back up and shut everyone out completely. He gave up on school deciding it was never really for him and just dropped out. He postponed putting the song he made out, his mental just wasn't in it. He started getting into the street life getting in and out of trouble. He felt like he had nothing to loose. He looked completely... soulless.

Yara tried comforting him but he simply pushed her away. She understood, being as though she witnessed the love he had for his grandma. But his grandma only wanted the best for him, which is why Yara tried so hard to get him out of the hole he dug himself. But Kentrell only pushed her away more.

Yara wanted to tell Kentrell that this would be her last summer at her grandma's house for a while. Her dad wanted her to come and live with him for a while. She was content on how her life was with her living with her mom but her dad felt they needed more 'bonding time' as he put it. Yara tried to contact Kentrell, but he was always out in the streets gun toting and corner hopping. She saw Kentrell change for the worse and self destruct. All she wanted was to be there for him, but he felt there was no him to be there for.

The whole summer Yara barely saw Kentrell, he was never home when she came to his house to check on him and he stopped answering her calls and texts. She sighed as she looked at the picture of the both of them on her dresser. She really needed to talk to him and it was making her even more frustrated and irritated that he was completely ignoring her. It was around 8pm at night but Yara felt the need to take a drive to get her mind straight. She grabbed the keys from her dresser after she put on some sweats and a hoodie walking out the door. As she was walking to her car, she saw a group of boys with some females standing at the end of the block. She was about to look away until she saw that familiar bow legged stance on one of the boys. She immediately knew it was Kentrell.

Instead of walking to her car, she started heading to where the group was standing. As she approached the group their laughter died down as they turned to stare at her. Kentrell noticed the shift in energy and he turned around surprised to see Yara's face. Guilt took over him, because he knew he had been ignoring her almost the whole summer. But he still didn't want to let his emotions show, so he put up his nonchalant unbothered act.

"Kentrell, we need to talk." Yara said with a serious look on her face as he stares back at her with no emotion.

"Yo Kentrell this another one of yo bitches?" this random boy in the circle said laughing while looking at Yara

"Nah she ain't my bitch." Kentrell said while looking Yara up and down with a smug look on his face

Yara was upset how he didn't take up for her as his 'friend' just called her out her name. But she wouldn't let it show for his amusement.

"First of all, I'm not a bitch and I'm not yo bitch so why the hell is you in my business if I didn't address you?" Yara said to the boy

"Mane bitch you need to pipe down. Kentrell handle that." The boy said as he turned his attention back on the two girls in the group

"Nigga I'll show you a bitch." Yara said as she was about to walk up to him, but Kentrell quickly grabbed her arm before she could

"Mane chill wit all that, what you want Yara?" he asked as he pulled her away from the group so they weren't in listening distance

"Nah fuck dat he was being disrespectful. And you supposed to have my back but lately I haven't even been seeing your front since you been ignoring me." Yara said as she stared at Kentrell intensely

Kentrell looked down scratching his head. "Mane Yara I was busy, chill." he said

"You were busy? Busy? Kentrell I know how you feel about your grandmo-"

"No the fuck you don't know how I feel. Don't even bring that shit up mane. You see me here having a good time and you bringing that shit up." He said as he mugged her

Yara was stunned how he was talking to her like she was just some random bitch off the street. Yes, it was dark outside, but with the street lights on she could see Kentrell clearly. And she could not recognize him.

"What you even doing here Yara, what you want?" he asked

Fighting back the tears in her eyes, Yara spoke up. "I wanted to tell you that this is my last month in Lousiana and I don't think I'll be here for the next couple of summers. My dad wants me to move in with him in New York. " she replied sadly with her head down

"So you leaving? You waited till the last month of summer to tell me this shit? Mane then just leave, that's all everybody do anyway they always leave me." Kentrell scoffed trying to suppress the hurt he was feeling

"FUCK YOU MEAN KENTRELL? I've been trying to contact you almost all summer and you've been ignoring me and out in these streets. You think you so hard now cus you toting that gun and running around with them niggas who don't give a shit about you?" Yara said nodding to the group of boys down the street

"You ain't hard, you just hardheaded cus you can't see that someone really cares about you and wants the best for you. But instead you've been pushing me away and trying to act like it's my fault that it took us this long to have this conversation!" Yara said anger written all over her face. She could've swore she saw a hint of remorse and guilt on Kentrell's face, but as quickly as she saw it, was just as quickly as it left.

Kentrell nodded taking in everything she said. He knew deep down she was right, he just didn't want to feel anything right now. He knew he was in the wrong, but as much as he wanted to apologize after seeing the hurt in her eyes, he couldn't bring himself to do it because he felt broken himself. He was broken and not even Yara could repair his heart.

"Look Yara, I gotta go they waiting for me. Ima catch up witchu later" Kentrell looked back at the group who waiting on him to make a drop.

"There won't be a later, I called my mom she's coming to get me tomorrow, today was my last day here." Yara said as her eyes watered. But she would not let him see her cry.

Kentrell hated that he was the cause of her feeling like this. He was about to drop this whole hardbody facade and comfort her until he got interrupted.

"YO, KENTRELL LETS GO" one of the boys from the end of the street yelled.

"Goodbye DeSean. Take care of yourself. And stay safe." Yara said with tears rolling down her face. Before Kentrell could respond, she turned around walking down the street.

Kentrell stared at her back wanting to run after her so badly, but that voice in his head creeped to the front of his mind saying 'she's better off without me'.

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Kentrell joined the group as they dapped each other up and they all went to go make this drop. One minute it was going smoothly and the next they were being chased by twelve. Kentrell tried to outrun them but he got cornered in an alley having no where to go. The cop slapped the handcuffs on his wrists and walked him to his squad car. Kentrell felt dumb in this moment. He knew the drop felt off but still decided to get it over with.

As he was in the back of the squad car he stared out the window. He couldn't help but replay Yara's words repeatedly in his head. He regretted it all. From him ignoring her, for disrespecting her and just not listening to her in general. She only wanted the best for him and look where that got him...in the back of a cop car. He knew he was going to Juvie. Cops see a black kid on the streets and they be quick to lock a nigga up. He sat back further in the seat on the way to station closing his eyes in frustration. The only thing clouding his mind was Yara.

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Looks like Kentrell is letting his pain consume him.

Do y'all think he doing Yara a favor by 'being better off without him'?

Don't forget to comment and vote!