addicted: judd birch & stass

CHAPTER 20: rumours

i began walking to the tech toilets, where i said i'd meet m. i got into there and took hostage in one of the toilets. i pulled out my phone to send her a text.

🔵i'm here x

i closed the messages app and went over to my photos. i realised there were no pictures of me and judd, we hadn't even thought to take any. i really wanted some, i cherished photos so much, and wanted to print some off to put onto my wall. i was just about to go through my photos out of boredom, until i heard the lock on my toilet door slide gently to the left.

'stass?' a voice asked. i swung the door open and stood up to hug her, my bag falling onto the floor. i hugged her as tight as i could and closed the door behind us.

'bitch i've missed you so much. so much has happened.' i spluttered, offering the closed toilet seat for her to sit on. i leant against one of the walls and got my vape out to share with her as we spoke.

'tell me!!! wtf happened with judd?' she yelped, taking a hit from the vape. i took a deep breath and then began explaining.

'i went to smoke during break time on monday and he was there. then i realised he followed my spotify. then i bunked school and bumped into him whilst i was in town. he gave me a lift home. then i got sad about my brother and went out, overdosed on some whack sleeping pills in my zoot, then woke up in judd's bed. we kissed. then he took me home and i got really worked up. then i went into school the next day and accidentally broke loads of rules. i had to have detention with judd and we had to clean classrooms. we made out or whatever, then ran out of school. he took me for a drive then i went to mine and grabbed my stuff. mum was a cunt to me and asked me who judd was and i just told her to fuck off, and left. then i lost my virginity to judd last night and now he's kind of my boyfriend.'

m almost fell off the toilet seat.

'what the actual fuck. i'm so happy for you stass, you deserve this.'

i slapped her jokingly and rolled my eyes.

'he makes me really happy, we've literally known each other properly for 4 days and i feel like i've known him forever.'

'well, you make that obvious. have you seen those big fuck off hickeys on your neck???'

i screeched and ran out the cubicle to look in the mirror. there were purple marks all over behind my ear and down to my collar bones. i huffed and pulled my jumper and collar as high up as i could.

'stass, i know you've only known judd 4 days, but like, have you not heard the stuff that goes round about him?'

i tilted my head and walked back to the cubicle.

'what stuff?'

'well, i don't know, i don't know if i should tell you, it might just be bullshit. i heard it just after i told you he had a thing for you.'

'tell me.' i demanded.

'well, when he was like 16 he had a girlfriend and he like apparently abused her. he like hit her when they argued and she didn't end up speaking about it until recently. loads of people think it's true and i-'

suddenly my vision went weird. i gripped both sides of the walls to keep myself stable. i swallowed the lump in my throat to helplessly stop tears jerking out my eyes.

'are you sure it's true?' i shakily replied.

'i think so. but it could be bullshit. stass i want to protect you and make sure he's not gonna be like that. maybe try and talk to him?'

'i gotta go.' i said, grabbing my bag, and my vape out of m's mouth, before slamming the door behind me. i frantically ran to the door, and started to walk towards the smoke spot in which me and judd had adopted as our own.

there were a million questions running across my brain, but the main one which i couldn't seem to get rid of, was why.

why me.