Mortdecai #3

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***You and Mortdecai go on holiday to America, where he unintentionally causes chaos the whole journey***

Half three in the morning:

"Charlie," I shouted up the stairs. "We're going to miss our flight."

"Coming, darling." He called over the bannister, a bottle of sunscreen in his hand. "I'm just - having trouble - lugging my suitcase - down - the stairs." He panted, grunting as he desperately pulled at the suitcase, his heels digging into the carpet.

I tapped my foot impatiently, checking my watch very couple of seconds.
We were going to be oh so late for the flight if we didn't hurry. Our plane left at six and it was half three, so maybe I was being a little paranoid about how late we'd be.

"Would you like me to take your luggage down for you, sir?" Offered Jock, from above.

"No, I can do it," Charlie protested. He paused. "Okay, yes, I'd like you to take my luggage downstairs for me."

"Right you are." Said Jock, picking up the suitcase and struggling down the stairs with it, whilst Charlie skipped merrily down the stairs in a floppy sunhat and dark sunglasses, humming 'God save the Queen' as he went.

I blinked.
In all the years we'd been married Charlie had never looked so relaxed.

"Wow," I said. "You look great. It's nice to see you in more relaxed clothes than your suit."

"Thank you, darling. And you look beautiful too." He put the floppy sunhat on top of my head and gave me a big smile.

I giggled.

"Oh, Jocky, pop it down there will you." He pointed behind him.

"Right you are." Jock did as he was told, putting it exactly as ordered. "Now," He pulled out a crumpled piece of paper from his jacket. "Your flight to LA leaves in precisely two and a half hours, so you'll want to get a move on, Sir and Madam."

Charlie looked at him over the top of his shades, as though saying 'Really, that's all?'

"Ok, I've checked that I have everything - and I do. Do you everything, sweetheart?"

"Yes. No. Where's the tickets and passports?"

"Here." Jock patted a bulge in his black jacket. "All safe."

"Phew." He wiped his forehead relievedly with his Hawaiian shirt.

"And might I add sir, I checked your suitcase several times to make sure you have everything - and you do, so you have nothing to worry about."

"Thank you Jocky, one couldn't ask for a better man-servant." He complemented as he pulled on his coat.

Jock nodded.

"Right, now that everyone has their gear, let's get going. Sir, you've forgotten something." Jock called as Charlie opened the door, the cold night air rushing inside.

"Brrr....Blimey it's cold." I wrapped my coat around me and rubbed my arms.

"Oh, yes, sorry darling." Charlie put his arm round my waist and hugged me. "I didn't mean to forget you, I'm just very excited about the whole thing."

I gave him a kiss on the cheek.
"I understand. I'm excited too."

"I meant your suitcase, sir." Jock gestured to the bulging case leant against the stairs.

"Oh, right. Well carry it to the car man, we haven't got all day. This is my time to relax and spend time with my wife - I'm not carrying anything." He put his sunglasses on and strutted out the door like a boss. "And if anyone asks, I shan't."

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