chapter fifteen

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Weeks have passed and neither Karl nor Sapnap had tried to reach out to another. He didn't know why but Sapnap was somehow disappointed. He thought that maybe the taller boy would fight for him. But what Sapnap didn't know was that Karl was just respectfully accepting the things that Sapnap wanted.

Space.

He wanted space so Karl gave him space. It was hurting him inside, that has to be said but that was something that Sapnap didn't see. All he saw was Karl being okay on the outside but that was because the brunet was good at hiding his pain. He didn't want the smaller boy to worry about him but actually, it made Sapnap feel worse.

Thoughts that were obviously not right were creeping up inside his head. Thoughts that were telling him that Karl didn't care, that he is fine without him. Of course Karl wasn't. He had been feeling his heart arching every night, every night before he falls into an irregular sleep. It's horrible, he wakes up so much at night.

It had been getting worse for weeks now. Karl guessed that it had started since they stopped talking but to be honest, he had been sleeping bad since months now and the only night he really slept well, was the night where he had slept in the smaller boy's arms. His skin started tickling at the thought of that, at the thought of his hand on his back, how he had comforted him. Karl closed his eyes with a heavy sigh leaving his lips. And again, just like the last few days he started seeing him and Sapnap. Events from a while ago, events that were marked down in his heart.

The sun was softly shining on Karl's face. He closed his eyes and inhaled the fresh forest air. It was so good, it had just stopped raining and the sun was already coming out between the few dark clouds that were still in the sky. Luckily the clouds were blown away pretty quickly and the sun shined the whole day. The ground underneath his shoes was muddy but he didn't care less, neither did the boy with him. They had been walking for a while now and the backpack on the smaller boy's back was getting heavy.

"Why do I have to carry this?", he asked.

"You wanted to, remember?", a gentle giggle slipped through Karl's lips and Sapnap's heart warmed slightly.

"You wanted to be a gentleman, like always",  the brunet added.

Sapnap rolled his eyes and tried to stop the smirk forming on his lips.

"I am a gentleman", his voice sounded somehow proud, the amused tone almost got lost in it.

Karl turned around and eyed him with an arched eyebrow.

"I am the one who's got a surprise for you. If anything then I am the gentleman", a smile overtook the taller boy's lips and Sapnap couldn't stop the smile creeping up on his own lips as well.

Suddenly, Karl stopped walking and of course Sapnap bounced into his back.

"Ouch! Why did you-" - " Look! There's a rainbow, that's a sign! I know exactly where we need to go", the brunet started walking quicker. He didn't care that he almost fell 3 times now because he oversaw many roots on the ground.

"You know, when you fell you'll be all muddy. Be careful, alright little one?", Sapnap's voice was soft and laced with a little bit of amusement.

Karl didn't listen to him, he was almost sprinting towards the end of the rainbow.

"This might seem like we're already there but what if we are wrong? This might be an illusion, Karl. We should stop walking so deep into the woods and just settle down here somewhere", the smaller boy was trying to stop Karl from running but his hand just reached forward to slip through air, just like a sigh slipped through Sapnap's lips.

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