💫Life is complicated
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oh do hear it?
here listen closely
can you hear the sound of my heart breaking?
no?
oh do you hear the silent sniffs?
here listen closely
can you hear the sobbing?
no?
oh can't you see the sadness?
oh can't you notice i'm dying?
oh can't you feel it?
the ice in my veins?
no?
do you even care?
oh can't you smell it?
the weed in my lungs?
no?
oh surely you notice the pills?
no?
ah now you see it?
can you feel it?
why are you crying?
perhaps is the blood staining your clothes?
oh now you see it?
oh now you care?
yes?
TOO LATE
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(Melody pov)
My hands cramped up as I dropped the pen and stopped writing. My eyes sting from the endless stream of tears. These are miserable and ever so doom days that seem to never end. It's painful to feel dead while you are still breathing in air. The endless pain doesn't seem to ever stop even with the sleeping pills and weed as well as alcohol consumption. Nothing seems to bring me joy or peace. It's just nothing but suffering....
Yeah...
Life sucks.
Whenever you are ready you should surrender to the abyss.
Saving me was a mistake.
And yet Elliot remains by my side even though I have been spiraling out of control telling him to leave me alone, He has endured many of my outbursts and hatred. This is surely insane right?. I mean for fuck sake...
I'm the reason his brother is gone and he's over here helping me?. Keeping me alive, worrying about me, falling in love with me. It just doesn't make sense...
And yet I remain distant and cold with him even though he tries to make me laugh and tries to feed me soup. He does this ridiculous humming of a lullaby that he has known since he was a child and would humm it ever so quietly to me when I'm sleeping. He thinks I don't hear him but I have and this is the type of gushy cute stuff that makes my head explode with absolute terror. I just can't see a path for us...
I inhaled sharply as I tossed the paper towards the trash can while my body tensed up as I heard the door of my bedroom open...
"Hey...that guy friend of yours is here and he's looking for you".
The way he said it was as if he was swallowing broken glass and was in pain. His jealousy spelled out of him like a wildfire...
I nodded my head as I got up from my seat and went to find Klaus standing about looking rather uncomfortable that Elliot was there...
Elliot simply stepped out of the apartment leaving us alone.
"So is he like your boyfriend now or...?"
He spoke in a manner that is easily described as pissed off. I shook my head and the memory of kissing Klaus popped into my head. Given that I didn't tell him anything about my attempt in suicide is clear to me that his not happy...
"I apologize that wasn't necessary, I meant to say is it true what I have been hearing around town?."
Ah yes because the whole town knows that I tried killing myself again. I cleared my throat and simply sat down on the couch...
"I'm alive Klaus, it doesn't matter what the town people are saying...and no he isn't my um boyfriend, he saved my life and now he doesn't wanna leave me alone...".
My life is complicated.
He nodded his head and glanced at me with a rather serious look on his face. "Why didn't you ask for help, Melody you could have died....I thought we were friends but then after that kiss you pushed me away and then you tried killing yourself ". He shook his head in annoyance....
"Let me help you Melody please, I just can't leave you alone like this"
I lowered my gaze and balled up my fist as my chest tightened making it difficult to get in a good breath. I loosened the tension within me as I prepared myself mentally. As if it was easy...
"No...I don't want your help...I mean look Klaus you shouldn't have to be going through this with me you don't need this type of toxicity in your life, you are good and sweet and you deserve happiness and we shouldn't be friends anymore because I will just hurt you".
How pathetic can I be?. How selfish can I be to be pushing him away again...
He looked disappointed.
He nodded his head and simply decided to just stop trying and so he left my apartment that day with a heavy heart and fear for my well being. Yet on his way out he bumped into Elliot and he said the following words to him.
Keep her alive, she loves you , now I see it she will never be mine. Even though we shared a kiss...
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Ooof.
How is everyone doing?
Me?.
Having some health issues but taking care of my little girl.
Life hasn't been easy but well looking forward to the future
YOU ARE READING
Ą poisonous kiss 💋(Book-1)
Romance"Loving two souls will destroy me." As a child she loved them both, however her mistakes caused utter chaos to unfold. In her adolescents she fell apart slowly and when faced with her past her unhealed heart shattered once more. And as a young adult...
