Ą poisonous kiss 💋(Book-1)

chapter-13

😶why do I care?
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(Elliot POV)

I gulped down the liquid that burned my throat and made my eyes watered yet I couldn't stop myself from drinking another glass of this toxic poison called vodka. My chest burned with anger for whatever reason since a couple of hours ago I saw Melody and that piece of garbage klaus, they were at the lake. I happened to be driving to the lake for a quick swim yet I found myself eyeballing the two of them. They looked rather cozy with each other so much that it made my heart rage. They laughed and ate their sandwiches ,I guess they were on a picnic...

She smiled brightly like before. That smile that I adored on her beautiful face was back. Her eyes seemed to sparkle again and it drove me crazy to see she was becoming more like her old self because of him. The way she looked at him was exactly like she used to see me. We were just kids back then yet the feelings we felt...well that I felt were real they were strong and I thought that we would be together forever yet it wasn't like that. Our time together was short and painful and yet the way she looked at him was nowhere compared to the look she used to give me back then...

Maybe she's in love with the jackass or maybe she's just using him to feel better about herself.

And yet here I am drinking away my jealousy. Why the fuck am I jealous?...

I shouldn't be!. She's the reason why my brother is dead so why am I jealous of this shit?. It makes no sense it makes no fucking sense. It's frustrating and beyond insane , I must be going insane...

"What the fuck is wrong with me. I shouldn't give a damn!".

"She's the reason why I'm in pain so why do I feel like this?. She's the reason why my brother is gone and why I'm....fuck her she's not worth it none of this is worth it"

"Fuck!"

I ended up throwing the glass against the nearest wall and watched as it shattered into a million pieces. I didn't hear when Lindsay walked into my room and witnessed it all. She stood with a bitch ass look that could easily kill anyone in its path. I brushed it off and walked past her without saying a single word to her...

I don't care about her true be told I have been using her to get Melody jealous for whatever reason. I don't understand it myself...

I stepped outside as I let go of a deep breath that I had been holding in. Anger and frustration began to tear me apart as every nerve in my body screamed in agony...

I shouldn't feel anything.

I shouldn't feel absolutely anything. She broke it all.

She shattered my heart.

I held him as he died.

Is her fault.

Is our fault.

I hate her.

I love her.

She deserves pain.

But

I love her

God dammit I love her.

From the moment I saw her again my dead heart began to beat again.

..........

A week later.

September is almost over and I ended up breaking up with Lindsay. She took it horribly and is now trying to destroy my life. As if my life could get any worse...

I scoffed at her pointless drama. I cleared my throat as I stood in front of the bar where Melody works. I walked in and sat down in a booth near the window. My expression softened as I laid eyes on her. She looked beautiful in her uniform. Truth be told, she's beautiful in any outfit, even her cat onesies. As long as I can remember she's always been obsessed about kittens. That's why her nickname is kitten...

He uh.

He called her that first.

I remember it as if it was yesterday. I remember as he ran into my room and happily said that the girl he liked kissed him after he ended up calling her kitten. I remember the illness I felt in my stomach after he said she kissed him. I remember the jealousy that swam into my bloodstream like poison. I remember I faked my happiness around him. I remember I lied and kept my feelings at bay for his sake...

I mean.

How would he have reacted if he knew I liked her too.

From the moment we met her at the tender age of six...

We had become best friends all three of us and as the years went by I found myself falling for that sweet girl who loved kittens...

And so did my brother.

We both fell for her yet she couldn't choose both of us. She kissed him first then went on and kissed me and told me about her feelings without giving a crap whether she had broken my brother's heart in the process. I should have known better yet I found myself ignoring his feelings and went on a date with her...

The date on the lake was our first and last date. Because shortly after that my brother killed himself...

He was only ten years old.

I lost him and buried him at the age of twelve years old...

We were just kids back then playing at love without knowing the consequences of it.

It was our fault.

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Ooof.

What do yall think?.

His internal struggles are coming out to play.