𝖣𝖾𝗍𝗋𝗂𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗅 𝖢𝗈𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇 [on hold]

33 | he was

XXXIII / thirty-three

✧𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐂𝐀✧

Laying on my couch sobbing, I hear a banging sound coming from outside. At first, I choose to ignore it because I have no energy to get up to answer it, however then I hear a voice calling out my name.

"Rebecca!" he utters so loud, the neighbors might get concerned.

I groan.

As I said, I have no energy to go there. Less if it's Hunter knocking on the door. I don't want to see him right now. I am embarrassed over all the crap that happened this morning, but in all honesty, there's a part of me that still wants him to scold me, or yell at me, or hug me, or not say anything. Anything.

Therefore, I get on my feet, ready to move towards the door. Before thinking of turning the knob, I am quick to wipe the tears off of my skin.

Consequently, I remember I was just crying, I remember why I was crying. I remember why I've been endlessly whimpering for the past week, and it all comes crashing down.

Turning and leaning against the door, I feel nothing but utter gloom. No more tears succeed to stream out on my cheeks, though, the staggering pain in the heart makes a presence in this lonely apartment.

"Hey, please open the door, " Hunter mumbles, more like a question rather than a plea. It's like he needs reaffirmation that I want to keep him around.

I lean back, bringing myself farther from the door, giving me space to turn the doorknob and to look at him standing on the other side of the wall.

I don't say anything.

I sigh.

That's all I do. I sigh. Then, I look up at him.

And I begin to scan him. I see his hair, his dark brown hair. I watch his jaw as it twitches, I gaze upon his lips as they are shutting up the words I know they want to let out. Finally, I look at his eyes, his amber eyes.

They never leave mine, not for one second. His eyes tell me things I couldn't bear to hear, good and bad things. They still stare at me stoically, in spite of me being on the verge of breaking down right on my doorstep.

Right in front of him.

This feels as though the earth just stopped. Time and space don't exist, those rules stopped applying the moment I saw him standing here.

"Hunter, I-, " I mumble with a knot on my throat as big as the watermelon I ate this morning.

Although I am aware that this all makes me seem extremely vulnerable which I despise thoroughly, I can't stop.

I've come to a point where trying to resist is more tiresome than actually giving in to the pain.

That makes me instantly think of Kade and the pain he surely was enduring. How much had been to make him come to terms with such a bad decision?

If only I were there to tell him that he didn't have to give in to it.

"I'm sorry!" I say, not having a clear idea of who I'm apologizing to.

Kade? Hunter?

I breathe.

"Rebecca, " he says my name, apologetically. With pity, actually.

I don't wait for him to come inside or to do whatever he came to do. I take a step forward and hug him tightly.

I wrap my arms around his waist and simply rest my head on his chest.