𝖣𝖾𝗍𝗋𝗂𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗅 𝖢𝗈𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇 [on hold]

15 | gone

XV / fifteen

✧𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐂𝐀✧

I make it home and I couldn't imagine a more disastrous scene.

To top what had happened with Hunter only a few minutes ago, the house is a mess. There's clothes thrown everywhere, sounds of cries coming from upstairs, and my dad sitting on the couch, as relaxed as he could possibly be.

It didn't take long for me to realize what was going on.

"Dad?" I ask getting closer to him as the word comes out, "Wh-what happened?"

He looks at me, but his gaze seems distant. He then proceeds to take another sip of his drink and stands up with difficulty.

Drunk. He's drunk.

"Your mom left!" He said stumbling upon the way. "She fucking left us!" He yells.

Oh, Lord. My heart beats increase at an imaginable pace. Though I've felt this, this time I don't only feel my heart threatening to jump out my chest, I feel like my soul is leaving my body, too.

"No, that's not true!" I negate. It can't be true.

He laughs.

Mom leaving us is the worst thing to happen. She is the one in the family that held us together. Although she wasn't a very understanding mom to me, she surely was to my siblings and the thought of them living without a mother terrifies me.

The thought of me living without her terrifies me.

"No no no no no!" I scream, falling onto my knees. Tears roll down my face as my heart breaks into a thousand pieces.

"Why?" I ask, but deep inside, I don't want to know the answer to that question, "Why did she leave?"

There was no response. But I had the answers. And more questions as well.

Did she just get tired of us? I think about how much of a burden we were to her, how she had to give up everything to be our mother and I think also about how that is her role as a fucking mother. She must sacrifice her life for her children. We didn't ask to be brought to this world, so we should face the consequences.

How selfish can someone be to the point where they leave such a precious thing as children, just so they can fulfill a void within themselves.

Even for me, she is and will always be my mother. No matter what I do, she'll just be. And I hoped she was going to be there.

Whenever I needed her.

"Becca!" A little voice cried out to me.

Johnny.

I broke down, even more, when I heard his voice. My brother has only six years of age and will have to live without a mother.

It pains me that she didn't think about us. Her kids.

Johnny came to me weeping and calling out my name, with his arms opened ready to give me a warming hug.