Aftertaste (Sin #2)

XLI.

Sebastian and I go to the small café near the university that's at a walking distance. We mostly kept quiet while walking there. I was too rattled up and too lost in my thoughts to even think about making a small talk with him.

We sit in the far corner in the café and we both order coffee and a muffin. I order a chocolate one and he orders a blueberry one and even that reminds me of Alexander because, while he adores the chocolate muffins I make, he always orders a blueberry one if we go out.

My mouth pulls down at the corners and I look at the table. I realise it's unfair to be thinking about the problems with my boyfriend while I'm on a coffee with a friend.

"How are you doing?" Sebastian asks me.

I shrug. "Good," I straight-out lie. But, in my defense, I don't know him well enough to unload all my problems on him. Frankly, and I don't mean this in a mean way, it's none of his business and I doubt he'd be interested in the boyfriend-drama. "How are you? How are the exams going?"

He shrugs as well. "Good. They're tough, but I'm tougher." He grins.

I try to smile back, but I don't think it comes out in the right way. God, I totally suck at this.

"How's the tutoring going?" Sebastian asks me, obviously kind enough to ignore my distress and put me out of my misery of being so anti-social I don't even know how to make a conversation because I'm so out of touch with reality later and I rather just swim somewhere with my thoughts all the time.

"Good. I actually really love it." It's a welcome distraction, especially now.

Sebastian sighs and looks through the window for a moment. "You know, you don't have to force yourself to be here. You could've said no and I'd understand and get the memo to leave you alone."

I immediately feel bad. Of course he'd get the wrong impression. "No, I ... I'm sorry. I just have a lot on my mind right now. I want to be here, I promise, I'm just not really a good company right now." I grimace at that. I should've just said no. He's obviously trying to be nice to me and I'm just not in the right headspace right now to even appreciate.

"Was that your ex bothering you?" Sebastian asks.

"No, my boyfriend. And he wasn't bothering me, we're just ... taking a little break right now."

"Ah," he says. And that's all. But he gets this funny expression that everyone gets when I tell them Alexander and I are taking a break and I don't understand it.

"What's with the expression?" I ask because I genuinely want to know since others know something I don't.

He quickly shakes his head. "It's nothing, really. I don't want to say anything about this because I don't know you and your situation, obviously, but I know a lot of people who did this taking a break thing, me being one of them."