THE RIGHT CHOICE

It wasn't meant to be

Kelly Proverb

Arriving in the house to find everyone  home , Young Lady where the hell have you two been ? Dad asks  so annoyed at me . Not now Dad, I know am in trouble let's just talk about my punishment later with that I walk away.  I lock myself in my room , my emotions were everywhere,  I hate how I feel , I most certainly hate  how I reacted to his confession and why the hell am I so upset with him . Tears keep flowing down my cheeks . Someone knocks at my  door  and after a few minutes Alex walks in . Hey Doll , he was testing the water we both knew that,  wanna talk about it ? Moments later I was crying on his shoulder.

Am so confused Alex , I don't know what am feeling ,I most certainly didn't mean to hurt him . Let it out Doll he keeps rubbing my back ,   moments later  Michelle and Fred  walk in , We are now in a group hug . Let me guess , you two just happen to be passing by I ask that between my  cries? Exactly they both reply.  Do you have feelings for him ? Fred asks. Feelings that , I myself  don't know what they are.  Maybe ,you know what they are but you are just too scared to accept them . Michelle says . With that said drops of tears spill from my eyes .

Maybe I do but am too scared of getting hurt again . The last one almost killed me guys , my heart can't take another hit . But what if you are depriving yourself an experience of a life time , I won't guarantee  you that... you won't get hurt , because no relationship is built with no heartaches and tears and all that crap  but you want to know what's the best part of it ? Fred asks  wiping my tears . I just nod. You are given everyday to love that someone right and you get to have someone  who stands with you for better or for worse and most importantly to keep you going .

I know you are scared but don't let that fear cost you so much more Doll . Alex adds .  Dad and Mom also  walk in and they totally agree with my siblings , Dad and Mom went on about their marriage and how it has ups and downs and I totally zoned out remembering the hurt face of Noel it's killing me here . I hurt him , I did something that I swore I would never do . I could hardly sleep , every single word that Noel said to me kept replaying back in my mind . I love you Kelly , love you my K, I love how he claimed me as his  .

I know I feel something for him , just don't know what the hell it is .The kiss with Noel crosses my mind again and at the same time my kiss with Jack , they both make  me feel different things .

I haven't been in the office for two days , decided I  needed time off to sort out all my issues , Noel has been trying to reach me but I haven't gathered the courage to talk to him yet , he has text  me a hundred times  apologysing for ruining our friendship but still makes  it clear to me, he doesn't regret it one bit , he has made it his mission to text me in the morning and at night I Love You texts  , I have found myself  multiple  times smiling at them and to really say the truth,  I crave for his kisses and hugs .

Today I woke up really early,  my Birthday is in four days from now meaning this Palace will be so busy and the investigation has been going on really well , we are so close on nailing the where abouts of the Hugh's daughter.  Malia graces  me with her presence and informs  me we have guests and that my presence is  needed . Arriving downstairs,  I find Noel at his sight my stomach does  a flip , his parents and the rest of my family .

I greet everyone and Noel happens to be the last one  , I find  myself hugging him tightly he was taken back by it but he hugs  me back .  We smiled at one another and everyone was looking  at us confuse . The best thing about Noel and I ,we fight but when we meet the next day it's like nothing ever happened, all the negativity forgotten and we are just happy to see one another.  I take  a sit between my two brothers who had nervous faces on .

Everyone looks  at Noel and with that he begins talking.  We all know our branch in New York hasn't been doing well in the last couple of months,  with that said he looks at me , we gaze at one another, after smiling at me he breaks it ,continues talking . Our majority share holders have been threatening to back off , I then saw panic in everyone's faces,  Don't worry , I talked to them and was thankfully able to change their minds but we have one small problem . What ? We all ask him .

They have demanded my presence in New York which means I won't be able to attend... he looks  at me again  , And I knew what he was about to say . Kelly's Birthday which also happens to be the official announcement of our wedding . Tears spill from my  eyes, I find myself walking  away from the meeting . I hear Noel calling out to me as he follows me , he catches  up with me and leads me to the garden. Does this happen to be because of what happened between us ? He didn't even look at me .

Don't you want to marry me anymore Noel ? He suddenly grabs me by the waist and pulls  me closer to him , You have no idea what I would give to marry you, even now if it were possible,  for you to be the first thing I see in the morning and the last thing I see at night , he says those words tears rolling down his cheeks and caressing my cheeks.But I know that's impossible K,  with that he closes his hurt eyes, it's impossible because... because you don't love me K , you still are  in  love with him and even though it fucking hurts ,that's the reality am stuck in and I can't do anything about it .

Jack will be here in , four days and so are your feelings towards him . I need to go , he looks at  my face as if trying to draw an image of me in his mind  , I need to forget these feelings  I have towards you K . I need to set you free and that can't happen if I stay because I don't know how I can do that . I just don't have the strength to see these beautiful eyes of yours look at him with so much love , a love that I wish belonged to me .

Noel ... I call  out for  him crying,  I feel so weak but also scared that he may be right about everything he just said . But what if ,his wrong ?That inner voice asks desperately . Noel ,please don't leave me , I hug him tightly,  please don't go . He gets me to look at him , can I ask you a question? I knew what it was and my heart was beating so fast.

What do you feel for me K because that kiss we shared spoke something,   I can openly tell the world I love you so much , what about you ? I was still in his hands ,still inches from his tempting love shaped lips and his breathe fanning my face making it feel tingling.  Having her in my hands feels like heaven , I could see she was struggling with her feelings and maybe Dad was right , Maybe we aren't meant to be but am still so happy that Jack is coming back and that she will be happy very soon .

It's okay K, I understand wiping her tears away  and am so happy I was given a chance to explore my feelings towards you  but sadly this is the end of K&N .Am so hurt , my throat is killing me and the tears am trying so hard to fight are threatening to spill. I need to leave,  my flight leaves in , I check  my watch , two hour from now . What , you are leaving today ? She cries at that . Hey , stop that , I can't leave knowing you are in this state . Hey , look at me K , she's still facing the ground. 

K ... I lift her chin , this maybe the end of K&N false  romance but it's definitely the start of an amazing friendship.  Can I ask you for a favour,  actually two ? I force a smile . She just nods  her head . Can you please look after my kids for me ? You know you don't need to ask me that . I smile at that.  What's the second favour? She asks  it so low , I barely heard it . Can I please hug you , it can be like... a breakup seal.  With those words out of my mouth tears spill . She hugs  me with no questions asked . She keeps  whispering in my ears begging me not to go , I could  feel  her hot breathe burning my neck skin ,I push myself from her , Don't cry,  Promise me that ? I'll try not to.  That's better after one light kiss on her lips , I am walking away from her,  I cry  myself but I know this is the best gift I can  ever give her .

Do you think it's really over between them . Have you ever experienced something similar letting go of the one you love for their happiness?