Russian Requiem (Book 2 of RR Trilogy)

Requiem #24

Chapter 24

(Fire)

I am so mad at Clade. He is not here when we needed him the most. Nakailang tawag kami sa kanila ngunit ni isa ay walang sumagot.

I don't think I can easily forgive them despite of their reasons for doing this---leaving us alone. Our safety was compromised. We were so fucking scared for our lives... Any reason cannot make up for it just like that.

"Mama, are the bad guys really gone now?" Clay asked after a long while of our tight embrace and noisy crying. His voice is firm, but I know that he's just trying to sound brave despite his fear.

Pinakatitigan ko siya, silang dalawa ni Carie. Basa pa ang kanilang mukha dahil sa pag-iyak habang nakatingala sa akin. I really can't believe that we were just threatened earlier. Ang takot namin ay matagal bago humupa. Kasama ang aming mga kasambahay at tagaluto, hindi kami makatayo mula sa pagkakalugmok sa sahig kung saan kami iniwan ng mga nanloob sa bahay.

"Mama?" Clay caught my attention when I didn't respond.

"Yes, son. They are gone now. Nobody's gonna harm us anymore." Sabi ko kahit na hindi ako sigurado.

"Where's daddy? We will chase those bad guys away if they come back."

That's the same question I've been fucking asking! Where the hell is he?!

I am not quite sure if I will be just mad at him, or I will be worried for his safety too, or both. I hate that he's not here with us. I hate that I don't even know where he is and how he is doing.

"I don't know, Clay. He's somewhere." Tapat kong sagot sa anak.

Huminga ako ng malalim bago ko tahimik na pinunasan ang kanilang mukha. Nang hawakan ko ang kanilang mga kamay ay ramdam na ramdam ko ang panginginig roon.

"Hey..." nag-aalala akong nag-angat ng tingin sa kanila. "Don't be scared anymore. Mama's just here. I will always protect you from bad guys, okay?"

They just nodded, but the trembling didn't go away. Hinila ko silang pareho upang yakapin ulit. I felt my chest area getting wet and I knew that they're crying again.

Dahil doon ay naging sariwa muli ang sarili kong takot para sa nangyari kanina. Nahawa ako sa pag-iyak ng dalawa kong anak.

Paano kung may nangyaring masama sa kanila? Paano kung mas hayop ang ginawa nang mga nanloob sa amin?

I don't think I can ever accept it if anything bad happens to my children. The world can throw any grenade at me, but not them. Never them!

"Nak..." I heard Chef Rossi's soft voice behind us. I turned my head to see her. "I think we should let the kids rest. They were the most scared earlier."

Kahit na buo ang kanyang boses, kita ko sa kanyang ekspresyon ang parehong takot na nararamdaman naming lahat. Tila ngayon lamang nag-sink in para sa iba naming kasama ang nangyari.